"The Shapechanger Connection" by Doranna Durgin
Doranna Durgin, who I have worked with for a blessedly long time, has graced us here with a marvelously personal essay, "The Shapechanger Connection." She's written something in the neighborhood of twenty-five books spanning multiple genres and knows whereof she speaks! (Also, check out her fun LiveJournal blog connerybeagle .)
"The Shapechanger Connection" by Doranna Durgin
Okay, I confess. Shapechangers have always fascinated me (check out
my very first fantasy, DUN LADY'S JESS, if you want proof!). And
writing shapechangers has always delighted me. I mean, what's not to
like? There's the primal allure, the vibrant nature, the potential
conflicts both inside and out...
For these are characters who function on instinct as much as thought,
and who must find ways to integrate their differences into a society
that cannot understand them. These are people who face great
responsibilities because of what they can do--or who face the battle
of exactly how to use their advantages (and make up for their
challenges) without ever giving themselves away to the world at
large. But more than that, these characters must manage themselves
and the very different way they experience the world relative to
everyone else. When your perceptions are so very askew from the
norm, it can be like living in a parallel world--what you experience
and how it affects you is completely different from the person right
beside you. Managing that impact leads to different behavior,
different choices, different reactions...it creates of you a secret
outsider in the midst of normality, whether you want it or not. It
means that all around you, there's a society living in one way, while
you live in another...and meanwhile you're being judged for choices
and reactions that seem impenetrable to them.
Things shifted a little to the personal there, I see. There's a
reason for that...and it turns out, it explains my lifelong
connection not only with the animals I train and love, but to the
continuing exploration of these characters who have their feet in two worlds.
This all rather surprisingly came home to roost about a year ago,
during a bodily meltdown that sent me off to the hospital and then an
intense and ongoing recovery. The neurological condition at the root
of things is one that not only keeps me from filtering sensory input
correctly, but it means my internal volume controls aren't set to the
norm. That man's quiet voice hits me like a shout; that woman's
expensive perfume might as well be an up-close-and-personal skunk.
Sensations are more meaningful--and potentially overwhelming--across the board.
It's also something I've had all my life, but which generally goes
critical after time and stress allow a pile-up of effects. And it
means that to some extent, I *am* one of my shapechangers. I hear
things you don't; I scent things you will swear don't exist. You
don't even want to know how many gas leaks I've detected (or how hard
I've had to argue with the gas company guys to keep looking until
they find them). I blossom in the quiet woods; I shrivel and fade in
any artificially hyped environment. The life of shapeshifter
characters--those who we generally imbue with heightened
sensitivities, an alert nature, and a readiness to react--is
something I know from the inside out. And now I know some of the
costs, too. I suddenly understand why I identify so readily with
such characters, and why I have such a drive to explore their
lives--and to reveal to them to readers.
Oh, okay. I admit it. I also like to write shapechangers of various
sorts because they're just so much doggone fun. I mean, seriously.
Anyone else up for a good wolf howl?