(no subject)

[variableshifter]

variable shifter: one thing about me at the moment, which i didn't really understand until last night, is that i feel only half real right now.
variable shifter: i came home, but i have no life to step into
variable shifter: i haven't gone back to work, i haven't gotten a different job, i sold the apartment to the girl who has been living in it while i've been away, but i haven't found another one
variable shifter: i sold my vehicle to my mom, but i haven't found another one
variable shifter: i have a satchel that carries everything i actually give a shit about
variable shifter: and that satchel just isn't that big
variable shifter: i have no life, i am rooted in nothing here, i could up and leave and i wouldn't notice missing anything except a couple of people
variable shifter: and i've never felt like that
variable shifter: while i was in iraq i had a life, much as i didn't like it sometimes
variable shifter: now, nothing
v o i d e i t y: its not liberating?
variable shifter: in a way it would be
variable shifter: but i have nothing to do with it
variable shifter: i don't have goals which i always wanted to fulfill, but never had time
variable shifter: what should i do with all this freedom?
variable shifter: i'm so goddamned pro-active