Sweet Dreams are Made of This
It's interesting... The desire to be hurt. Abused. And it's growing stronger: the wish the Eke, or even someone else, would just beat the shit out of me. Beat me till I'm unconscious... As long as he came back. Give me what I deserve, hit me... But stay. Most likely it's a fear of abandonment in a different form. Right now I just want to piss him, or someone else, off so bad to where they'll lash out at me.
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