The Holiday
I have been thinking about how much i used to dwell on stupid shit like what to say to those type of people and how to prove that i am like them and to show them that I really gave a damm when i have finally realized that the whole time i was just giving myself excuses to why i did the thing i did and hung out with the crowd i did when really the whole time i would sit there and look around and wonder why the fuck am i with these people, they didnt give a damm about me or anyone else for that matter and i guess i have come to realize that most people my age are like that. I have always been told that i am very mature for my age and i look at that as a good thing but when im surrounded by people that i just cant get along with. i feel like im surrounded by idiots everyday. I feel like i can go no where in this town and the time that i have left here is just getting in the way of what i really want to be doing. Im so greateful that i have the opportunity to move away from here and live in a house without parents to tell me whats right and whats wrong, even though my sis will be there to do that. I was told a few days ago that i had no reason to complain, because my family is "well off" i the financial department. and i literally sat there and thought to myself. do people honestly that that just because you have money it makes everything so much better. I honestly think people that do have money have it harder because of that standard society has set. i just dont get people sometimes, maybe what i dont get is me with people. well my house will be built in Febuary so thats one positive this i can start looking for new furniture and what not and then soon ill be finally away. one thing i dont get about so kids is that they finally graduate h.s. and they decide to stay in the town that they are. i feel like you cant accomplish anything if you are stuck in the same mindset your whole life, im just one of those people that has to have change in their lives. i cant have the same hair color for too long or the same hair style, the same job or the same living situation. i like the challenge of a new environment a new city a new school new people to impress or to piss off i just cant see myself as one of those people who are strictly routine.
AHHH...that felt good.
AHHH...that felt good.