(no subject)
Well.
I've dropped the baby off. Now my guestrooms are completely full. I have Eight in his barrel, the baby in a cask, and Firiel still demanding I get some fresh crumpets.
Oh, that does remind me. I had a chat that was done *ages* ago, the first night I grabbed her, well after the hand was dropped off. I'll share it with you now, loves.
Vanyon: Would you like a crumpet?
Firiel: Why yes, thank you. *eats* So, are you and your wife the only vampires in Arda?
Vanyon: Yes. She made some children, but I killed them
Firiel: You killed your children?
Vanyon: her children. Not mine. Children are people we turned into vampires like us. Not actual birth
Firiel: Ah. I didn't know that. Why did you kill her children?
Vanyon: I know the difference between sentimentality and competition.
Firiel: *nods* And you didn't make any children?
Vanyon: no. I have enough trouble sharing the world with my wife.
Firiel: Oh. And you don't mind that you two are the only vampires?
Vanyon: Two is far too many
Firiel: *nods*
Firiel: So, for food, you drink blood? I don't know much about vampires.
Vanyon: Yes, that's pretty much it
Firiel: And you've been around since the beginning?
Vanyon: Yup.
Firiel: Wow. Wouldn't you get tired of being around for so long?a
Vanyon: I do, constantly. That's why I stopped plain hunting and started tormenting people.
Firiel: Oh. And it amuses you to torment people?
Vanyon: It keeps the boredom from setting in. I try and do new things. Sometimes I don't even torment. I've been known to enjoy plain conversation
Firiel: *nods, smiles* I didn't think I'd be saying this, but I'm enjoying your company. It's so different from when we met the first two times. Though, you're very polite.
Vanyon: Thank you. Well, I'm not trying to kill or eat you right now.
Firiel: *nods* Which is why I'm enjoying your company.
Vanyon: By the way. Do you use any sort of perfume?
Firiel: Perfume? No. Why?
Vanyon: I'm just trying to get everything right. No specific scents?
Firiel: Not that I wear. Everyone has their own scent, but I don't wear anything.
Vanyon: I'll just steal your soaps, then. *sighs*
Firiel: Why would you want to steal my soaps?
Vanyon: The body parts I'm leaving them. I want the pieces to smell like you
Firiel: You're going to leave them more body parts? Wasn't one hand enough?
Vanyon: Well, it's easier than actually killing one of your friends
Firiel: Well, yes, but why would you do either?
Vanyon: Chaos and disorder. *takes a sip of his tea*
Firiel: Oh, of course. Well, don't scare them *too* terribly much, please? I have a feeling the hand would be enough....
Vanyon: Well, since I can't send them the head... I was thinking maybe something personal.
Firiel: *raises an eyebrow* Personal?
Vanyon: Her heart in your boyfriend's room. Maybe some other bits. A "Dear god, we're dealing with a mad man" thing
Firiel: Oh. But... you know, if you did things like that, they'd definitely come find you and try, if not succeed in killing you?
Vanyon: Oh, don't worry. I'm smart enough to keep moving. They won't catch me until I'm good and ready
Firiel: ...You can outrun them like that?
Vanyon: A lot of people underestimate the advantages of being able to survive dropping out of windows from the tops of buildings
Firiel: Oh. Sounds like a useful ability.
Firiel: About sending the girl's body parts... how much of her do you think you'll send? *winces slightly at the thought*
Vanyon: Well, the head is out. I'm considering her upper body but I'm not sure if you two match that well
Firiel: Well, if you would really like to send her torso.... No one knows what I look like. As long as she's somewhat the same size and shape that I am... And I can't believe I'm telling you this...
Vanyon: I'll get a measuring tape later. Her lower body is fine. So I can send anything from there.
Firiel: Who would you send parts to?
Vanyon: Well, the more intimacy related ones I'll send to your boyfriend. I'm thinking your other hand can go to the king, along with maybe the entire arm
Vanyon: Not sure about your legs
Vanyon: her legs, even
Firiel: So it's not just a "scare Luthien" thing?
Vanyon: Actually, it's moved into the pissed at Arvedui stage. I want to inspire your boytoy to come rushing after me and then I can get victim number two for Luthien's gifts. AND make Arvedui look like a failure
Firiel: But you wouldn't hurt Frey, would you?
Vanyon: as long as he doesn't cause me any real harm, he'll be fine
Firiel: But after sending him parts of "me", don't you think he'd want to come kill you?
Vanyon: I'll see about trapping him instead
Firiel: But he'd be safe?
Vanyon: You know what I love about royalty? I kill as many servants as I like and talk about slicing them to bits and they don't start caring about anything until I talk about just *hurting* another royal. No one else really matters.
Firiel: He's not just a royal. He's my beloved. And I thought the girl was already dead? Before I came with you?
Vanyon: Ten minutes after, actually. I was mostly keeping her around as entertainment and a light snack
Firiel: Oh. *fidgets* Well, if I'd known that, I wouldn't have come with you. I don't want others to die on my behalf.
Vanyon: *sighs and shakes his head*
Firiel: What?
Vanyon: I would have dragged you by your hair and used your own hand, then
Firiel: *sighs* Better me than someone else. I don't want to have anyone's death on my conscience.
Firiel: I'm just wondering, but if you're mad about what Arvedui did, shouldn't you not send parts of "me" to others, and send it to him? *shakes head at self*
Vanyon: The more I make him look like a failure and an idiot, the better I'll feel.
Firiel: But then you'll have a lot of people coming after you, rather than one.
Vanyon: I hate being bored
Firiel: What does your wife do when she's bored?
Vanyon: I have no idea. Yells at me, probably
Firiel: O.o
And now, six minutes ago.
Firiel: Vanyon! Why did you have to kidnap Luthien's baby?
Vanyon: I thought you'd like company. *hands it over*
Firiel: *takes the baby gingerly* But she's just a child.
Vanyon: Easier to grab
Firiel: Luthien's going to be furious.
Vanyon: That's the plan
Firiel: You *want* her to be angry with you? More so than she already is?
Vanyon: yes
Firiel: Why?
Vanyon: I want to see who'd win
Well, I feel positively giddy. I should go get in costume for the dramatic showdown(tm).
Or I could take my winnings and head off. Firiel is, despite lectures about the cruelty of carving up serving girls, excellent company. And perhaps I've missed out on the joys of fatherhood. Not to mention I've re-acquired my pet.
Things are so complicated when you're me.
I've dropped the baby off. Now my guestrooms are completely full. I have Eight in his barrel, the baby in a cask, and Firiel still demanding I get some fresh crumpets.
Oh, that does remind me. I had a chat that was done *ages* ago, the first night I grabbed her, well after the hand was dropped off. I'll share it with you now, loves.
Vanyon: Would you like a crumpet?
Firiel: Why yes, thank you. *eats* So, are you and your wife the only vampires in Arda?
Vanyon: Yes. She made some children, but I killed them
Firiel: You killed your children?
Vanyon: her children. Not mine. Children are people we turned into vampires like us. Not actual birth
Firiel: Ah. I didn't know that. Why did you kill her children?
Vanyon: I know the difference between sentimentality and competition.
Firiel: *nods* And you didn't make any children?
Vanyon: no. I have enough trouble sharing the world with my wife.
Firiel: Oh. And you don't mind that you two are the only vampires?
Vanyon: Two is far too many
Firiel: *nods*
Firiel: So, for food, you drink blood? I don't know much about vampires.
Vanyon: Yes, that's pretty much it
Firiel: And you've been around since the beginning?
Vanyon: Yup.
Firiel: Wow. Wouldn't you get tired of being around for so long?a
Vanyon: I do, constantly. That's why I stopped plain hunting and started tormenting people.
Firiel: Oh. And it amuses you to torment people?
Vanyon: It keeps the boredom from setting in. I try and do new things. Sometimes I don't even torment. I've been known to enjoy plain conversation
Firiel: *nods, smiles* I didn't think I'd be saying this, but I'm enjoying your company. It's so different from when we met the first two times. Though, you're very polite.
Vanyon: Thank you. Well, I'm not trying to kill or eat you right now.
Firiel: *nods* Which is why I'm enjoying your company.
Vanyon: By the way. Do you use any sort of perfume?
Firiel: Perfume? No. Why?
Vanyon: I'm just trying to get everything right. No specific scents?
Firiel: Not that I wear. Everyone has their own scent, but I don't wear anything.
Vanyon: I'll just steal your soaps, then. *sighs*
Firiel: Why would you want to steal my soaps?
Vanyon: The body parts I'm leaving them. I want the pieces to smell like you
Firiel: You're going to leave them more body parts? Wasn't one hand enough?
Vanyon: Well, it's easier than actually killing one of your friends
Firiel: Well, yes, but why would you do either?
Vanyon: Chaos and disorder. *takes a sip of his tea*
Firiel: Oh, of course. Well, don't scare them *too* terribly much, please? I have a feeling the hand would be enough....
Vanyon: Well, since I can't send them the head... I was thinking maybe something personal.
Firiel: *raises an eyebrow* Personal?
Vanyon: Her heart in your boyfriend's room. Maybe some other bits. A "Dear god, we're dealing with a mad man" thing
Firiel: Oh. But... you know, if you did things like that, they'd definitely come find you and try, if not succeed in killing you?
Vanyon: Oh, don't worry. I'm smart enough to keep moving. They won't catch me until I'm good and ready
Firiel: ...You can outrun them like that?
Vanyon: A lot of people underestimate the advantages of being able to survive dropping out of windows from the tops of buildings
Firiel: Oh. Sounds like a useful ability.
Firiel: About sending the girl's body parts... how much of her do you think you'll send? *winces slightly at the thought*
Vanyon: Well, the head is out. I'm considering her upper body but I'm not sure if you two match that well
Firiel: Well, if you would really like to send her torso.... No one knows what I look like. As long as she's somewhat the same size and shape that I am... And I can't believe I'm telling you this...
Vanyon: I'll get a measuring tape later. Her lower body is fine. So I can send anything from there.
Firiel: Who would you send parts to?
Vanyon: Well, the more intimacy related ones I'll send to your boyfriend. I'm thinking your other hand can go to the king, along with maybe the entire arm
Vanyon: Not sure about your legs
Vanyon: her legs, even
Firiel: So it's not just a "scare Luthien" thing?
Vanyon: Actually, it's moved into the pissed at Arvedui stage. I want to inspire your boytoy to come rushing after me and then I can get victim number two for Luthien's gifts. AND make Arvedui look like a failure
Firiel: But you wouldn't hurt Frey, would you?
Vanyon: as long as he doesn't cause me any real harm, he'll be fine
Firiel: But after sending him parts of "me", don't you think he'd want to come kill you?
Vanyon: I'll see about trapping him instead
Firiel: But he'd be safe?
Vanyon: You know what I love about royalty? I kill as many servants as I like and talk about slicing them to bits and they don't start caring about anything until I talk about just *hurting* another royal. No one else really matters.
Firiel: He's not just a royal. He's my beloved. And I thought the girl was already dead? Before I came with you?
Vanyon: Ten minutes after, actually. I was mostly keeping her around as entertainment and a light snack
Firiel: Oh. *fidgets* Well, if I'd known that, I wouldn't have come with you. I don't want others to die on my behalf.
Vanyon: *sighs and shakes his head*
Firiel: What?
Vanyon: I would have dragged you by your hair and used your own hand, then
Firiel: *sighs* Better me than someone else. I don't want to have anyone's death on my conscience.
Firiel: I'm just wondering, but if you're mad about what Arvedui did, shouldn't you not send parts of "me" to others, and send it to him? *shakes head at self*
Vanyon: The more I make him look like a failure and an idiot, the better I'll feel.
Firiel: But then you'll have a lot of people coming after you, rather than one.
Vanyon: I hate being bored
Firiel: What does your wife do when she's bored?
Vanyon: I have no idea. Yells at me, probably
Firiel: O.o
And now, six minutes ago.
Firiel: Vanyon! Why did you have to kidnap Luthien's baby?
Vanyon: I thought you'd like company. *hands it over*
Firiel: *takes the baby gingerly* But she's just a child.
Vanyon: Easier to grab
Firiel: Luthien's going to be furious.
Vanyon: That's the plan
Firiel: You *want* her to be angry with you? More so than she already is?
Vanyon: yes
Firiel: Why?
Vanyon: I want to see who'd win
Well, I feel positively giddy. I should go get in costume for the dramatic showdown(tm).
Or I could take my winnings and head off. Firiel is, despite lectures about the cruelty of carving up serving girls, excellent company. And perhaps I've missed out on the joys of fatherhood. Not to mention I've re-acquired my pet.
Things are so complicated when you're me.