Engel Lied: Chapter II: Him
Chapter two, enyoy!!
Following where chapter I left, Castiel still tries to understand his emotions, leading to unexpected results.
Chapter II: Him
Feelings... Castiel didn’t know to what this would lead then, but the mere existence of this feelings was something he had never experienced before. Thousands of years of existence but this was the first time that he cared about a human beyond his mission. But, against the fear of the unknown, he wanted to explore this rising sun in his soul, that illuminated every fiber of his being in a way that not even the Eternal light of heaven could do. The bell above the door ringed again as the last customer left, leaving Castiel, Tara and the cook alone in the restaurant. Tara looked at the clock, it was a bit past eleven. She smiled at Castiel and shouted at Adam.
-Sugar!! I’m gonna take a break-
-Whatever... I'm going to watch my soap’s- The cook took his apron off and disappeared behind a door with the sign “Personal Only”, shortly after a noised sound could be heard, something about “Señoritas de Campo”. Tara dimmed the lights of the dinning and disappeared behind the counter, reemerging with a six-pack of beer in her arms. Castiel stared, curious about what she was doing.
-Here, this will make it easier- Tara threw a can of beer at Castiel, the which, mirroring the girl’s movements, opened it and drunk -Now, spill it off-
Castiel tasted the beer in his mouth, not really used to the flavor. However he drank the can to it’s very last drop within seconds.
-Someone is disturbed- Castiel felt the sympathetic stare of the waitress.
-It is like... i never...- The angel struggled with is own inability to express feelings with human words -I have never felt this way for anyone-. Tara pulled a box of cigarettes from her pocket, putting one in her mouth and offering another to Castiel. The angel negated with his head while she lighted up hers.
-So, who’s the lucky lady?-Tara questioned.
-Lady? no, he is not a lady- Castiel leaned his head.
-Ohh... so you’re into guys... that's fine, i mean, i have nothing against gay folks, you know... they’re cool, you’re cool... yes, i mean... you know what i mean....- Tara’s words rambled upon themselves.
-I do not know what you mean-
-It’s like, it’s not like a lot of gay dudes come to hang out in dinning stops in the roadway... i don’t know how it works...- While saying this, the waitress made a strange mimic with her fingers -But is’t cool... i mean, i used to watch Will & Grace- Castiel looked at Tara confused, and inquired her.
-What does gay mean?-
-All right... you are really Amish or a Tibetan monk...- Tara took a deep breath - Gay guys are guys who like other guys, right?- Castiel looked at himself, recognizing his vessel, Jimmy Novak .. he was a man. A man in love with a woman.
-Men love women- said Castiel.
-Yes, well generally, but, there are exceptions, you know...- This time Castiel knew what Tara was saying, it was him about loving another man. But the leap between “feelings” and “love” was something he couldn’t follow... Were his feelings for Dean..love?-
-I am not secure if i am “in love” with him-
-So, that is your problem... you want to know if you love him or not, or maeby just experiment with him- Tara cast her stare on the roof while she seemed to recall an old memory -experiment... that’s fun... anyways- Said while handing Castiel another beer and picking up another for her -It's very easy to know if you ask me-
-Tell me if I love him- The angel opened his eyes and mind, expecting that someone could tell him an obvious truth, the kind of truth he hadn't felt in weeks.
-I can’t tell you if you love him, but you can find out with a few Q&A- Tara smiled at him.- Are you ready?-
-Yes-
-Do you think in him constantly?-
-Yes-
-Do you feel good when he is around?-
-Yes-
-Do you like to stare at him?-
-Yes-
-Does his scent linger when he is gone?- Tara said this while making and elaborate movement with her hands.
-Yes-
-Would you die for him?-
-Yes- Castiel responded automatically, before thinking in anything, his mission, his task. He would die for him. He confronted Alastair head on, without thinking in his own safety. That time he tried to lied himself, It is my task but deep down his luminous self, he knew, he knew that his was for that man. The man that he saw lying damaged in a hospital bed. The pain of that moment snapped something inside him, and like a broken dam, ravaged everything in its wake. It was a pain that he had to hide, from him, and from his brothers. He would die then thousand times before feeling that pain again. He would die if that meant saving him.
-Yes- he mustered again with his gravely voice. Tara caressed his face and smiled compassionately at him. Castiel had his answer.
The bell over the door ranged again, two truckers had entered the dining stop. Tara excused herself for a moment and went to take the orders of the costumers. When she looked out for Castiel he wasn’t there, only the empty beer cans and the dish with pie leftovers.
-Cass... you didn’t pay again-
Following where chapter I left, Castiel still tries to understand his emotions, leading to unexpected results.
Chapter II: Him
Feelings... Castiel didn’t know to what this would lead then, but the mere existence of this feelings was something he had never experienced before. Thousands of years of existence but this was the first time that he cared about a human beyond his mission. But, against the fear of the unknown, he wanted to explore this rising sun in his soul, that illuminated every fiber of his being in a way that not even the Eternal light of heaven could do. The bell above the door ringed again as the last customer left, leaving Castiel, Tara and the cook alone in the restaurant. Tara looked at the clock, it was a bit past eleven. She smiled at Castiel and shouted at Adam.
-Sugar!! I’m gonna take a break-
-Whatever... I'm going to watch my soap’s- The cook took his apron off and disappeared behind a door with the sign “Personal Only”, shortly after a noised sound could be heard, something about “Señoritas de Campo”. Tara dimmed the lights of the dinning and disappeared behind the counter, reemerging with a six-pack of beer in her arms. Castiel stared, curious about what she was doing.
-Here, this will make it easier- Tara threw a can of beer at Castiel, the which, mirroring the girl’s movements, opened it and drunk -Now, spill it off-
Castiel tasted the beer in his mouth, not really used to the flavor. However he drank the can to it’s very last drop within seconds.
-Someone is disturbed- Castiel felt the sympathetic stare of the waitress.
-It is like... i never...- The angel struggled with is own inability to express feelings with human words -I have never felt this way for anyone-. Tara pulled a box of cigarettes from her pocket, putting one in her mouth and offering another to Castiel. The angel negated with his head while she lighted up hers.
-So, who’s the lucky lady?-Tara questioned.
-Lady? no, he is not a lady- Castiel leaned his head.
-Ohh... so you’re into guys... that's fine, i mean, i have nothing against gay folks, you know... they’re cool, you’re cool... yes, i mean... you know what i mean....- Tara’s words rambled upon themselves.
-I do not know what you mean-
-It’s like, it’s not like a lot of gay dudes come to hang out in dinning stops in the roadway... i don’t know how it works...- While saying this, the waitress made a strange mimic with her fingers -But is’t cool... i mean, i used to watch Will & Grace- Castiel looked at Tara confused, and inquired her.
-What does gay mean?-
-All right... you are really Amish or a Tibetan monk...- Tara took a deep breath - Gay guys are guys who like other guys, right?- Castiel looked at himself, recognizing his vessel, Jimmy Novak .. he was a man. A man in love with a woman.
-Men love women- said Castiel.
-Yes, well generally, but, there are exceptions, you know...- This time Castiel knew what Tara was saying, it was him about loving another man. But the leap between “feelings” and “love” was something he couldn’t follow... Were his feelings for Dean..love?-
-I am not secure if i am “in love” with him-
-So, that is your problem... you want to know if you love him or not, or maeby just experiment with him- Tara cast her stare on the roof while she seemed to recall an old memory -experiment... that’s fun... anyways- Said while handing Castiel another beer and picking up another for her -It's very easy to know if you ask me-
-Tell me if I love him- The angel opened his eyes and mind, expecting that someone could tell him an obvious truth, the kind of truth he hadn't felt in weeks.
-I can’t tell you if you love him, but you can find out with a few Q&A- Tara smiled at him.- Are you ready?-
-Yes-
-Do you think in him constantly?-
-Yes-
-Do you feel good when he is around?-
-Yes-
-Do you like to stare at him?-
-Yes-
-Does his scent linger when he is gone?- Tara said this while making and elaborate movement with her hands.
-Yes-
-Would you die for him?-
-Yes- Castiel responded automatically, before thinking in anything, his mission, his task. He would die for him. He confronted Alastair head on, without thinking in his own safety. That time he tried to lied himself, It is my task but deep down his luminous self, he knew, he knew that his was for that man. The man that he saw lying damaged in a hospital bed. The pain of that moment snapped something inside him, and like a broken dam, ravaged everything in its wake. It was a pain that he had to hide, from him, and from his brothers. He would die then thousand times before feeling that pain again. He would die if that meant saving him.
-Yes- he mustered again with his gravely voice. Tara caressed his face and smiled compassionately at him. Castiel had his answer.
The bell over the door ranged again, two truckers had entered the dining stop. Tara excused herself for a moment and went to take the orders of the costumers. When she looked out for Castiel he wasn’t there, only the empty beer cans and the dish with pie leftovers.
-Cass... you didn’t pay again-