(no subject)
So why is it that guys think that the all time greatest pick up lines include something along the lines of:
"you look like you're not having a good time"
"what's wrong?"
"why are you always standing by coat check?"
"smile" and
"you should talk to me and be nice to me and trust me because I'm acquaintances with someone you know, yet I haven't exactly mentioned that to you yet."
Yes, it's the bar scenario. Yes, I should expect this from stupid drunken men. Yes, they're just there to get laid. Puh-lease. People, or rather GUYS... these pick-up lines are so outdated, cumbersome, annoying and tiring. Find some new ones. Because the next time some guys says to me "Smile", I swear I am going to throw my drink in his face.
What is it about that phrase that annoys me, you ask? Well, other than the fact that 90% of the male population come up and say this to me, it's really such a lame pick up line. Do you really expect me to stand there and smile the whole night? Just because I am not SMILING does not mean that I am not having a good time. It just simply means that I am not some stupid goofball who walks around the bar all night carrying this lame grin on my face to make some stupid impression. I can just see it now: If I do carry a stupid grin on my face all night, some loser will come up to me and say: "Why are you smiling so much? It looks like you're having too good of a time and I'm worried about that". I bet you're thinking "IS IF Melissa, that's not going to happen." Believe me people, with my luck, it WILL happen.
So I am really the queen of bitchiness at the bar. I really hate when strange guys come up and talk to me. This one guy did last night and he annoyed the hell out of me. I had no clue who he was, had never seen him in my life. But he felt the need to approach me and ask me what was wrong (because I didn't have that lame goofball smile on my face) and what could he do to make my night better and invited me to hang out with his friends. Um, hello..... I have never seen you in my life, I am sober, I don't trust men so easily, so why should I follow you around like a lost puppy? Just because you happen to know someone I am acquainted with at the bar does not give you the card that you can talk to me and expect me to be best buddies with you right away. I didn't even find out until 10 minutes into the annoying conversation that he knew Dean, so why would I even give him the time of day before that?
Ok, you're probably thinking... holy, she's such a bitch. True, true. What is so wrong with being friendly? Well, when I do that, I start flirting and often get caught in situations I can't handle or situations where I have to say no. I mean, I am not the type to go home with a guy from the bar, or even date one for that matter (there are a couple of exceptions to this rule, but I have "known" these guys longer than just an encounter or two). Guys get the wrong impression when you are friendly -- it indicates to them "yes, take her home." SO, instead of having to break their poor little hearts, or shall I say dicks, I just stop them right upfront and avoid a whole big mess.
My friend seems to think I'm a tad crazy that I'm so bitchy. She said to me, how can you get to know people if you don't talk to them? I pondered this for a moment. Now let me tell you that there are lots of people I talk to there... but they are usually people who I have seen there more than once. Not that it makes them any less likely to try and pick me up, but just the fact that I see them there more often gives them a bit more weight than someone I have never seen before. One of my great friends at the bar is Troy, who I didn't talk to for at least a year after I had started going there. Lately, I have been meeting more of his friends and talking with them. I've been liking that because I feel safe with Troy and know that I can feel safe with his friends too. Being a female at a meat market deems necessity of feeling safe.
So through all of this, you're probably asking "If you're having this problem week after week with guys and you just don't like it, then why do you hang out at this silly bar?" Well, despite all of the 'grief' I put up with, I do have a great time (even if it doesn't show on my face). I have a lot of buddies there and I love to dance and just hang out. And there ARE times I feel the need to be friendly with other guys. It usually depends how much booze I'm having and my particular tolerance of people that day.
But thinking about this, I often complain that people don't give me a chance 'cause they think I'm a bitch, without really getting to know me. So in a sense, it's my fault that I am putting up this wall because in many instances, I do act like a bitch and I like having that to protect me. So I'm kind of being a hypocrite here.... hmmmmm..... I am wondering how I can get rid of people's perception of me that I'm a bitch, when in reality, when they could be trying to get to know me, that is the very front I put up. Interesting.
Ok, so I am a bitch. Plain and simple. BUT, if you want to get to know me, it would probably be best not to use one of the lines I mentioned at the beginning of this journal. It's less likely I'll bite your head off. And ya never know, I might just be in the mood to be friendly. :)
Ok, ok.. I have to work on this, I really do.
"you look like you're not having a good time"
"what's wrong?"
"why are you always standing by coat check?"
"smile" and
"you should talk to me and be nice to me and trust me because I'm acquaintances with someone you know, yet I haven't exactly mentioned that to you yet."
Yes, it's the bar scenario. Yes, I should expect this from stupid drunken men. Yes, they're just there to get laid. Puh-lease. People, or rather GUYS... these pick-up lines are so outdated, cumbersome, annoying and tiring. Find some new ones. Because the next time some guys says to me "Smile", I swear I am going to throw my drink in his face.
What is it about that phrase that annoys me, you ask? Well, other than the fact that 90% of the male population come up and say this to me, it's really such a lame pick up line. Do you really expect me to stand there and smile the whole night? Just because I am not SMILING does not mean that I am not having a good time. It just simply means that I am not some stupid goofball who walks around the bar all night carrying this lame grin on my face to make some stupid impression. I can just see it now: If I do carry a stupid grin on my face all night, some loser will come up to me and say: "Why are you smiling so much? It looks like you're having too good of a time and I'm worried about that". I bet you're thinking "IS IF Melissa, that's not going to happen." Believe me people, with my luck, it WILL happen.
So I am really the queen of bitchiness at the bar. I really hate when strange guys come up and talk to me. This one guy did last night and he annoyed the hell out of me. I had no clue who he was, had never seen him in my life. But he felt the need to approach me and ask me what was wrong (because I didn't have that lame goofball smile on my face) and what could he do to make my night better and invited me to hang out with his friends. Um, hello..... I have never seen you in my life, I am sober, I don't trust men so easily, so why should I follow you around like a lost puppy? Just because you happen to know someone I am acquainted with at the bar does not give you the card that you can talk to me and expect me to be best buddies with you right away. I didn't even find out until 10 minutes into the annoying conversation that he knew Dean, so why would I even give him the time of day before that?
Ok, you're probably thinking... holy, she's such a bitch. True, true. What is so wrong with being friendly? Well, when I do that, I start flirting and often get caught in situations I can't handle or situations where I have to say no. I mean, I am not the type to go home with a guy from the bar, or even date one for that matter (there are a couple of exceptions to this rule, but I have "known" these guys longer than just an encounter or two). Guys get the wrong impression when you are friendly -- it indicates to them "yes, take her home." SO, instead of having to break their poor little hearts, or shall I say dicks, I just stop them right upfront and avoid a whole big mess.
My friend seems to think I'm a tad crazy that I'm so bitchy. She said to me, how can you get to know people if you don't talk to them? I pondered this for a moment. Now let me tell you that there are lots of people I talk to there... but they are usually people who I have seen there more than once. Not that it makes them any less likely to try and pick me up, but just the fact that I see them there more often gives them a bit more weight than someone I have never seen before. One of my great friends at the bar is Troy, who I didn't talk to for at least a year after I had started going there. Lately, I have been meeting more of his friends and talking with them. I've been liking that because I feel safe with Troy and know that I can feel safe with his friends too. Being a female at a meat market deems necessity of feeling safe.
So through all of this, you're probably asking "If you're having this problem week after week with guys and you just don't like it, then why do you hang out at this silly bar?" Well, despite all of the 'grief' I put up with, I do have a great time (even if it doesn't show on my face). I have a lot of buddies there and I love to dance and just hang out. And there ARE times I feel the need to be friendly with other guys. It usually depends how much booze I'm having and my particular tolerance of people that day.
But thinking about this, I often complain that people don't give me a chance 'cause they think I'm a bitch, without really getting to know me. So in a sense, it's my fault that I am putting up this wall because in many instances, I do act like a bitch and I like having that to protect me. So I'm kind of being a hypocrite here.... hmmmmm..... I am wondering how I can get rid of people's perception of me that I'm a bitch, when in reality, when they could be trying to get to know me, that is the very front I put up. Interesting.
Ok, so I am a bitch. Plain and simple. BUT, if you want to get to know me, it would probably be best not to use one of the lines I mentioned at the beginning of this journal. It's less likely I'll bite your head off. And ya never know, I might just be in the mood to be friendly. :)
Ok, ok.. I have to work on this, I really do.