(no subject)

[vanillavenom]

After I got my two shots at the doctors today I started sobbing. I couldn't help it. First I thought I was having a reaction to the tb test...All of a sudden I felt very alone and very not okay with it. And that FEELING came back...that thing I have been trying to figure out. What the hell is wrong with me? What is it? Are they sezures? Anxiety attacks? Is it psychological? Is there something wrong with my heart?Tears were just pouring out of me. The nurse came in and freaked out. She made me lie down and brought me water and dragged my doctor back in before I went to have more needles put into me and more blood sucked out of me. Usually I'm a very strong independent person. I've driven myself to the hospital on several occasions and done a lot of scary shit alone. There is so much I have to do now though, so much I have to pack to buy to mentally prepare myself for.

I'm scared.

There is a lot of love in me. Just aching to be let out. I miss everyone already.

Jesus. I have two days left.

2 days...

I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow
I'm never gonna know you now
But I'm gonna love you anyhow