personality is environmental
today i realized how little what i do has anything to do with my own will. things that i do really just happen, like a brain that does it's own thing as a machine. in order to be the person i want to be, i really just have to be surrounded by the kind of people that help bring it out of me. while i'm at school, for instance, i can't imagine that i'd spend a summer without reading any of the books that i normally love, but the truth is that without anyone to talk to about it i can't sit down and do it. when i'm at home the things i care about change. also, i find that i can predict what i'll actually do, even if it isn't something i want. like, at the beginning of the summer predicting that i wouldn't get a real job, that i wouldn't really be capable of it and i don't think i have been.
i watched ghost in the shell today and reaffirmed that it's by far, really the only anime that i care about in depth. i don't like sci-fi for sci-fi's sake, just made to have a narrative story that's entertaining for instance. sci-fi should be a medium to creatively reconfigure the present, or our views of the present, by showing us parallel worlds or possibilities that could exist. a william gibson novel for instance, will take certain aspects of the world that we haven't fully explored, and amplify them in a futuristic setting, allowing us to review the world around us as something that is already sci-fi and futuristic.
in other news, while i've come to terms with other things that i thought were wrong with my laptop (finding out that there is actually nothing wrong) my spacebar is totally numb and only recognizes keystrokes if i hit it harder than usual, making typing 10% more obnoxious. i'll probably eventually just learn to hit it harder, and it will be like the doorhandle on my car - impossible to use for someone else, but something i know how to open automatically even though it's broken.
i watched ghost in the shell today and reaffirmed that it's by far, really the only anime that i care about in depth. i don't like sci-fi for sci-fi's sake, just made to have a narrative story that's entertaining for instance. sci-fi should be a medium to creatively reconfigure the present, or our views of the present, by showing us parallel worlds or possibilities that could exist. a william gibson novel for instance, will take certain aspects of the world that we haven't fully explored, and amplify them in a futuristic setting, allowing us to review the world around us as something that is already sci-fi and futuristic.
in other news, while i've come to terms with other things that i thought were wrong with my laptop (finding out that there is actually nothing wrong) my spacebar is totally numb and only recognizes keystrokes if i hit it harder than usual, making typing 10% more obnoxious. i'll probably eventually just learn to hit it harder, and it will be like the doorhandle on my car - impossible to use for someone else, but something i know how to open automatically even though it's broken.