Wendy's: The Ultimate Adventure
Hello fellow travelers. I know its been a while, and I know that you are so anxious for another entry that you may just slit your own wrists if one isn't delievered soon. Well, put that knife away (at least until the end of the entry), because we have some fresh shiznit coming your wizay.
So, my brother informs me Sunday afternoon that Wendy's was doing a promotion where every customer could get a free Jr. Frosty. No purchase was necessary, and I was highly intrigued. He mentioned he and his friend had been out the night before and hit about 6 of them, and had a total of 8 Jr. Frostys. He thought he had accomplished a goal. My mind was set, we must not only beat that record, but I had to destroy it, demolishing it into a million shards that would travel out to the distant cosmos.
This goal was not just about my own selfishness and greed for things free (though it was highly based off of this), it was about proving once and for all to the commie bastards, that USA was numero uno.
I met up with my friend Patrick at Borders and told him of the plan. He agreed full heartedly, and we made due course for the closest Wendy's.
The first Wendy's, Patrick feared prosecution from the employees if they saw us go through the drive thru and eat inside, so he said we could only eat in and come back later. I was hesitant, but there wasn't much I could do. We only had one Jr. Frosty from this location, I have determined this was our only defeat of the night.
On progress towards Wendy's number 2, I finally convinced Patrick that double hitting the Wendy's was the most efficient way. From here on, we slowly developed a routine that would give continuity to the whole trip.
The routine was simple. We would see a Wendy's sign in the distance, and both I and Patrick would shriek "Frost-ies!" and high-five each other. We would hit the inside first, seeing what kind of operation they were running at each location. Patrick would stand ahead of me in line then do the old "no, after you" schtick when we were next in line. I would inquire, so innocently, "Are you doing that free Frosty thing?". Most locations would chirp in before the comment reached completion with a "YEAH, HOW MANY YOU WANT?!". We combated the shrillness with a rich "2", followed with Patrick putting up 2 fingers behind me. We would then pull a spoon from out pocket and eat the Frosty inside. I was able to accomplish using only one spoon the entire night, unfortunatly for my co-captain, his spoon broke at location number 6 and he had to begin a new.
Then we would proceed to the car and get a Frosty from the drive thru. Patrick would mimic my innocence I displayed earlier inside by asking in a soft voice "Are you doing the free Frosty thing?" They would yell at us to pull around to the second window. We complied and recieved our treats. We would then eat the Frosty en route to the next Wendy's.
We had no driving itinerary at all. We flew by the seat of our pants. However, it seems that this great nation of ours is riddled with Wendy's. We were unable to pass through 4 stop lights with out running into another location. It got so bad in a stretch, we actually hit 3 locations in a 6 or 7 minute period, and then disaster struck.
After hiting the quick combo of Wendy's, we started to feel ill from the amount of Frostys we had eaten. We were only half way through the drive thru Frosty from the previous Drive Thru when we ran into yet another Wendy's. We knew that we had rough seas approaching, but nothing could prepare us for what was about to occur.
Upon entering this Wendy's, it was quite confusing, there was no other customers inside. At all the other locations, there were at least 4 or 5 other people enjoying free Frostys, however, it appeared to be a ghost town. However, it would soon be evident we were only in the eye of a storm.
Through the process of our little routine, we were informed by the cashier that the Jr. Frosty cups were all gone. Our hearts were almost broken for a second. Did we finally reach the end of our path? However, before we could shed a tear, the casheir shoved a wooden stake through our hearts. He followed up with (in a whisper), "Here, I'll just give you a medium one, even though we aren't supposed to be doing this". We were absolutly devastated. Patrick, practically fainted and rested his head on my shoulders whimpering. Our already sickening stomach would have to endure the hardest challenge of all, eating a normal sized Frosty. This was the turning points in our journey, and perhaps our lives.
We slowly walked back to our seats, distraught to say the least. Right when our posteriors hit the seat, suddenly the place was filled with people. Obviously, some underground Frosty movement had heard word of this place giving away normal sized ones. The place was starting to fill.
At this moment, Patrick calls one of his friends to discuss our situation. Upon telling his friend that we were starting on a medium, and we had eaten 13 previously, a group of men turned their heads quickly. Apparently, two of them were part of this challenge as well, and proceeded to stand up and eat Frostys at a speed that could only be described as ravenous. They practically ran out the door, knowing they were behind.
We barely finished these medium monstrosities when we noticed that the workers were forced to lock people out of the dining room since they were giving away so much Frosty. Me and Patrick decided the drive thru line (spilling to the street) was not worth the wait. We would return we vowed, that we wouldn't let them win.
TO BE CONTINUED TOMORROW BECAUSE I'M TIRED, LOLLAFFLE!
So, my brother informs me Sunday afternoon that Wendy's was doing a promotion where every customer could get a free Jr. Frosty. No purchase was necessary, and I was highly intrigued. He mentioned he and his friend had been out the night before and hit about 6 of them, and had a total of 8 Jr. Frostys. He thought he had accomplished a goal. My mind was set, we must not only beat that record, but I had to destroy it, demolishing it into a million shards that would travel out to the distant cosmos.
This goal was not just about my own selfishness and greed for things free (though it was highly based off of this), it was about proving once and for all to the commie bastards, that USA was numero uno.
I met up with my friend Patrick at Borders and told him of the plan. He agreed full heartedly, and we made due course for the closest Wendy's.
The first Wendy's, Patrick feared prosecution from the employees if they saw us go through the drive thru and eat inside, so he said we could only eat in and come back later. I was hesitant, but there wasn't much I could do. We only had one Jr. Frosty from this location, I have determined this was our only defeat of the night.
On progress towards Wendy's number 2, I finally convinced Patrick that double hitting the Wendy's was the most efficient way. From here on, we slowly developed a routine that would give continuity to the whole trip.
The routine was simple. We would see a Wendy's sign in the distance, and both I and Patrick would shriek "Frost-ies!" and high-five each other. We would hit the inside first, seeing what kind of operation they were running at each location. Patrick would stand ahead of me in line then do the old "no, after you" schtick when we were next in line. I would inquire, so innocently, "Are you doing that free Frosty thing?". Most locations would chirp in before the comment reached completion with a "YEAH, HOW MANY YOU WANT?!". We combated the shrillness with a rich "2", followed with Patrick putting up 2 fingers behind me. We would then pull a spoon from out pocket and eat the Frosty inside. I was able to accomplish using only one spoon the entire night, unfortunatly for my co-captain, his spoon broke at location number 6 and he had to begin a new.
Then we would proceed to the car and get a Frosty from the drive thru. Patrick would mimic my innocence I displayed earlier inside by asking in a soft voice "Are you doing the free Frosty thing?" They would yell at us to pull around to the second window. We complied and recieved our treats. We would then eat the Frosty en route to the next Wendy's.
We had no driving itinerary at all. We flew by the seat of our pants. However, it seems that this great nation of ours is riddled with Wendy's. We were unable to pass through 4 stop lights with out running into another location. It got so bad in a stretch, we actually hit 3 locations in a 6 or 7 minute period, and then disaster struck.
After hiting the quick combo of Wendy's, we started to feel ill from the amount of Frostys we had eaten. We were only half way through the drive thru Frosty from the previous Drive Thru when we ran into yet another Wendy's. We knew that we had rough seas approaching, but nothing could prepare us for what was about to occur.
Upon entering this Wendy's, it was quite confusing, there was no other customers inside. At all the other locations, there were at least 4 or 5 other people enjoying free Frostys, however, it appeared to be a ghost town. However, it would soon be evident we were only in the eye of a storm.
Through the process of our little routine, we were informed by the cashier that the Jr. Frosty cups were all gone. Our hearts were almost broken for a second. Did we finally reach the end of our path? However, before we could shed a tear, the casheir shoved a wooden stake through our hearts. He followed up with (in a whisper), "Here, I'll just give you a medium one, even though we aren't supposed to be doing this". We were absolutly devastated. Patrick, practically fainted and rested his head on my shoulders whimpering. Our already sickening stomach would have to endure the hardest challenge of all, eating a normal sized Frosty. This was the turning points in our journey, and perhaps our lives.
We slowly walked back to our seats, distraught to say the least. Right when our posteriors hit the seat, suddenly the place was filled with people. Obviously, some underground Frosty movement had heard word of this place giving away normal sized ones. The place was starting to fill.
At this moment, Patrick calls one of his friends to discuss our situation. Upon telling his friend that we were starting on a medium, and we had eaten 13 previously, a group of men turned their heads quickly. Apparently, two of them were part of this challenge as well, and proceeded to stand up and eat Frostys at a speed that could only be described as ravenous. They practically ran out the door, knowing they were behind.
We barely finished these medium monstrosities when we noticed that the workers were forced to lock people out of the dining room since they were giving away so much Frosty. Me and Patrick decided the drive thru line (spilling to the street) was not worth the wait. We would return we vowed, that we wouldn't let them win.
TO BE CONTINUED TOMORROW BECAUSE I'M TIRED, LOLLAFFLE!