A random piece of silliness
Or, VT spends too much time thinking about Tom Lenk and BtVS.
Set somewhere during S7. No spoilers.
Dawn switched off the television in disgust. "This movie is terrible. I mean, evil twins?"
Willow nodded in agreement. "Yeah, who on earth comes up with this stuff? It's totally implausible."
"So speaks the only child," said Buffy drily. "I've my doubts about Dawn."
"Not evil. Not your twin." Dawn waved her hand dismissively.
"Unless you count that whole my blood is your blood dealie," added Xander. "Which I'm still a little fuzzy about."
"God!" sighed Buffy. "Was nobody listening to me back then?"
"Well, we were all a little concerned with the death, and the destruction, and the world-ending, and did I mention the death?" replied Xander.
Everyone in the room looked down awkwardly.
The silence was eventually broken by Andrew. "I had an evil twin."
He was answered with a host of incredulous stares.
"I did. Well, maybe he wasn't strictly evil. He didn't have a mustache or a goatee. He tried but it looked pretty stupid so Tucker kept teasing him about it."
"You have a twin brother!" exclaimed Willow. "That makes so much sense. I kept wondering why I kept wanting to call you a name that wasn't, you know, yours. I just found it safer to stick to the one fact I knew about you."
Andrew nodded shyly. "Yeah. My brother's name's Cyrus. He wasn't always evil, unless count that he broke my lightsaber. And those comics he ripped. And that time he made it look like I was the one who..." He trailed off under Buffy's glare.
"Andrew, get to the point before I have to hurt you."
Andrew gulped, then blurted out. "He was vamped!"
Xander looked sympathetic. "Man, that sucks. Not quite sure it really counts as evil-twinnage though?"
Pouting, Andrew replied. "Well, it's not easy trying to cope with a family gettogether and you're the only one who's not allowed to drink because he's all six minutes older and a vampire and then whenever everybody's drunk he keeps trying to bite you."
"Hold on. You had family fun with the soulless demon inhabitting your brother's corpse!" There aren't really enough occasions to use the word "flabbergasted". Describing Xander's expression would be one of them.
"Not the whole family," Andrew explained earnestly. "We didn't really do much stuff together. But Tucker decided that we Wells Brothers should stick together, and it was kind of fun." He rubbed his neck absent-mindedly. "Apart from the times he tried to bite me. But at least then Tucker would yell at him, so he stopped while Tucker was in the room."
This was weirder than they had expected from Andrew. Willow was the one who ended up probing further.
"You don't happen to still keep in contact with... " (The evil soulless fiend.) "Your brother, do ya?" She grinned nervously.
"No," Andrew looked down sadly. "He dropped out of touch a couple of years back. He's probably away somehwere with his vampire friends, doing vampire stuff." The pout had returned. "I bet he's having the time of his life ...death ...unlife ...thing."
Buffy and Dawn had been exchangin g nervous looks throught the later part of this conversation. Buffy finally spoke. "You had an identitical twin brother. Named Cyrus. Who was vamped and then disappeared about two years ago."
Andrew nodded. "That's what I said," he added, happy to know his story had been attended to. "I wonder where he is now."
Quickly Buffy replied. "I'm sure he's having lots of happy vampire fun. Very sure."
Dawn nodded emphatically. "Absolutely. With lots of blood and comic books. Now let's get back to the movie."
Willow looked confused. "Didn't you hate it?"
Two sets of patented Summers' glares silenced her. "Okay, movie. Fine."
Set somewhere during S7. No spoilers.
Dawn switched off the television in disgust. "This movie is terrible. I mean, evil twins?"
Willow nodded in agreement. "Yeah, who on earth comes up with this stuff? It's totally implausible."
"So speaks the only child," said Buffy drily. "I've my doubts about Dawn."
"Not evil. Not your twin." Dawn waved her hand dismissively.
"Unless you count that whole my blood is your blood dealie," added Xander. "Which I'm still a little fuzzy about."
"God!" sighed Buffy. "Was nobody listening to me back then?"
"Well, we were all a little concerned with the death, and the destruction, and the world-ending, and did I mention the death?" replied Xander.
Everyone in the room looked down awkwardly.
The silence was eventually broken by Andrew. "I had an evil twin."
He was answered with a host of incredulous stares.
"I did. Well, maybe he wasn't strictly evil. He didn't have a mustache or a goatee. He tried but it looked pretty stupid so Tucker kept teasing him about it."
"You have a twin brother!" exclaimed Willow. "That makes so much sense. I kept wondering why I kept wanting to call you a name that wasn't, you know, yours. I just found it safer to stick to the one fact I knew about you."
Andrew nodded shyly. "Yeah. My brother's name's Cyrus. He wasn't always evil, unless count that he broke my lightsaber. And those comics he ripped. And that time he made it look like I was the one who..." He trailed off under Buffy's glare.
"Andrew, get to the point before I have to hurt you."
Andrew gulped, then blurted out. "He was vamped!"
Xander looked sympathetic. "Man, that sucks. Not quite sure it really counts as evil-twinnage though?"
Pouting, Andrew replied. "Well, it's not easy trying to cope with a family gettogether and you're the only one who's not allowed to drink because he's all six minutes older and a vampire and then whenever everybody's drunk he keeps trying to bite you."
"Hold on. You had family fun with the soulless demon inhabitting your brother's corpse!" There aren't really enough occasions to use the word "flabbergasted". Describing Xander's expression would be one of them.
"Not the whole family," Andrew explained earnestly. "We didn't really do much stuff together. But Tucker decided that we Wells Brothers should stick together, and it was kind of fun." He rubbed his neck absent-mindedly. "Apart from the times he tried to bite me. But at least then Tucker would yell at him, so he stopped while Tucker was in the room."
This was weirder than they had expected from Andrew. Willow was the one who ended up probing further.
"You don't happen to still keep in contact with... " (The evil soulless fiend.) "Your brother, do ya?" She grinned nervously.
"No," Andrew looked down sadly. "He dropped out of touch a couple of years back. He's probably away somehwere with his vampire friends, doing vampire stuff." The pout had returned. "I bet he's having the time of his life ...death ...unlife ...thing."
Buffy and Dawn had been exchangin g nervous looks throught the later part of this conversation. Buffy finally spoke. "You had an identitical twin brother. Named Cyrus. Who was vamped and then disappeared about two years ago."
Andrew nodded. "That's what I said," he added, happy to know his story had been attended to. "I wonder where he is now."
Quickly Buffy replied. "I'm sure he's having lots of happy vampire fun. Very sure."
Dawn nodded emphatically. "Absolutely. With lots of blood and comic books. Now let's get back to the movie."
Willow looked confused. "Didn't you hate it?"
Two sets of patented Summers' glares silenced her. "Okay, movie. Fine."