Discretion is the better part of valour
Coming out is important. I rejected my sexuality for so many years because I had no role models. After I came to terms with being gay in 1996, I wanted to make a difference for other people by making myself visible, telling my story.
I didn't realize the difficulty until my recent experiences with the anxiety group. This week I considered whether coming out to these acquaintances was the best thing for me. We're finished next Wednesday. Should I distress myself for the sake of intimacy with people I'll never see again?
Being an honest person makes one vulnerable. The truth does not always protect. The past decade I've learned that I don't have to reveal anything I don't want to.
Choosing discretion, I decided not to come out to the group.
Yesterday we had a barbecue, a social opportunity with a safe group. Actually, it hardly felt safe for any of us, but the best cure for anxiety is facing your fears. Only three of us plus my daughters turned up.
Ironically, the conversation turned to Toronto Pride, which gave me an opening. My revelation was received with acceptance. A start.
Exercising my choice allowed it to happen naturally.