I think sometimes it feels like when everything is ok there is just nothing to say. Complaints are easy because you can list like 12 things wrong and people get why they're wrong. Just writing, "I'm doing great" seems pointless and perhaps a bit braggadocios? I would suggest maybe not worrying about it so much and just writing. Like maybe try to just write something, anything once a week. Eventually it will come, right?
Or not, I write too often probably so I could just be talking out my ass. Luckily I love talking out my ass so I'm ok with it.
yeah, you're right - i do feel like i've got little to nothing to say about the good things, and that weirds me out because i feel like i should. if i can, at times, expound at length (sometimes fairly eloquently) upon each and every nuance of my misery, i feel like i should be able to give the same attention to detail when i'm totally psyched. my verbosity should not be limited, at least i don't think it should, and it pisses me off that it seems to be. so yeah, good call. i am trying to write more. i have a fancy little journal that i was given for christmas, i need to start dragging that around with me.
and thank you, things are going mostly well. i think i might have gained a couple pounds, but i haven't stepped on the scale in awhile. i haven't felt the need to though, so i think that's maybe a step in the right direction as backwards as that sounds. attitude-wise, anyway.
Definitiyl a good thing. Also, don't discount the fact that it is therapeutic often to bitch about things being bad. You don't really need the same catharsis when you're feeling good. There's no actual shame in that.
well, it's less that i'm concerned with having any sort of catharsis when i'm feeling good, what frustrates me is that i only seem to be able to express myself through creative writing is that i'm fucking depressed out of my mind. the poems and essays that i write when i feel like my world has collapsed are significantly better than anything i ever write when i'm content. it doesn't seem fair that my only source of inspiration is self loathing and i can only produce when my outlook is bleak - if anything, it seems narcissistic and masturbatory. looking for the words to express happy in pretty ways feels foreign, and i hate that.
Isn't this the way of most art though? This is really veering into the realm of what is human nature but most great art seems to be spurred on by pain and loss for whatever reason. I mean, I guess that's cliche and all but you know, it's a lot easier to think of examples of that.
Who knows what drives us I guess, I'm kind of just rambling here. I get what you're saying I think.
Or not, I write too often probably so I could just be talking out my ass. Luckily I love talking out my ass so I'm ok with it.
PS Good job on the everything going well.
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and thank you, things are going mostly well. i think i might have gained a couple pounds, but i haven't stepped on the scale in awhile. i haven't felt the need to though, so i think that's maybe a step in the right direction as backwards as that sounds. attitude-wise, anyway.
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Who knows what drives us I guess, I'm kind of just rambling here. I get what you're saying I think.
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