You know what...i hate life
Alright this is for those that were wondering what was wrong with me the other day at lunch. I was NOT crying abut me not being able to do the mural...like OTHER people like to tell everybody.So heres the story before everyone starts uapping their traps when they dont know what its even about!
Do you even know how hard it is to live my life. No...no one does except me.No one knows about how many times ive had to leave all my friends and my school and my home.No one understands what its like to see your parents fighting..or seeing a man take a beating on your mother..or to see your mother crying because she doesnt know what to do and you can do nothing to help.Thats what its like...everyday.And recently only a couple of people know whats been happening...and you know how stressful that is.All i needed was a friend to talk to...and hardly anyone has been there for me...Becky is the only one ive told that has taken some time our of her day to actually ask me if i was okay...THE ONLY one!I am very appreciative that she did...but im also very disappointed that shes the only one.Me and her arent really the greatest of friends yet..we are just getting to know eachother and already she has shown more friend ship then nyone else. Want to know what I am going through?! Right now at this very second I am the one who is down here supervising everything..i get to watch them take all our stuff away..and watch him treat my mother like garbage..and listen to the whispering about us and our family.Thats what i get to listen to everyday.Thats what my life consists of....Then when i go to school and try to getaway from it all, i get made fun of everyday, and when i try to do something about it the school,my friends,the teachers...they all do nothing.Nothing is done and the abuse continues.Theni get the oppornunity to paint a picture that is quite beautiful if i might say on a wall.So that everyone can see my work,my art...is all thats ever mattered to me.Nothing matters more,not school,not friends,not anything..and thats not meant to be offensive.My art will ALWAYS be there for me, it will get me a job and make me money..nothing i have will do that for me like my art will.And then i get told that im not allowed to do it?Am i not good enough?Why does this school not want me to display my work?Do i suck at it?I know the answer to that question...the answers no.I dont suck..and i am good enough.Why should i help that school at all or give them the pleasure of my hard work.Im not.i never will.Ill never do ANYTHING for that school ever again! You know how i feel lately....and for a long time before this...Suicidal.I want to end all this crap because i dont need it.And i DONT care about what any of you think about it.I NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR OPPINION! if i want to do it...then I will.Im sick of people laughing at me.And saying im not good enough.And saying im ugly and hurting me in every way possible.Im sick of seeing people that i dont want to see...im sick of people treating me like crap....im done talking about this...i have to go now..
Do you even know how hard it is to live my life. No...no one does except me.No one knows about how many times ive had to leave all my friends and my school and my home.No one understands what its like to see your parents fighting..or seeing a man take a beating on your mother..or to see your mother crying because she doesnt know what to do and you can do nothing to help.Thats what its like...everyday.And recently only a couple of people know whats been happening...and you know how stressful that is.All i needed was a friend to talk to...and hardly anyone has been there for me...Becky is the only one ive told that has taken some time our of her day to actually ask me if i was okay...THE ONLY one!I am very appreciative that she did...but im also very disappointed that shes the only one.Me and her arent really the greatest of friends yet..we are just getting to know eachother and already she has shown more friend ship then nyone else. Want to know what I am going through?! Right now at this very second I am the one who is down here supervising everything..i get to watch them take all our stuff away..and watch him treat my mother like garbage..and listen to the whispering about us and our family.Thats what i get to listen to everyday.Thats what my life consists of....Then when i go to school and try to getaway from it all, i get made fun of everyday, and when i try to do something about it the school,my friends,the teachers...they all do nothing.Nothing is done and the abuse continues.Theni get the oppornunity to paint a picture that is quite beautiful if i might say on a wall.So that everyone can see my work,my art...is all thats ever mattered to me.Nothing matters more,not school,not friends,not anything..and thats not meant to be offensive.My art will ALWAYS be there for me, it will get me a job and make me money..nothing i have will do that for me like my art will.And then i get told that im not allowed to do it?Am i not good enough?Why does this school not want me to display my work?Do i suck at it?I know the answer to that question...the answers no.I dont suck..and i am good enough.Why should i help that school at all or give them the pleasure of my hard work.Im not.i never will.Ill never do ANYTHING for that school ever again! You know how i feel lately....and for a long time before this...Suicidal.I want to end all this crap because i dont need it.And i DONT care about what any of you think about it.I NEVER ASKED FOR YOUR OPPINION! if i want to do it...then I will.Im sick of people laughing at me.And saying im not good enough.And saying im ugly and hurting me in every way possible.Im sick of seeing people that i dont want to see...im sick of people treating me like crap....im done talking about this...i have to go now..