Late night up
So today is my third attempt at an all nighter. I hope to not fall asleep at all because it is kinda bugging me that I can't wake up to my alarms. I should be writing one of my many papers right now but instead, decided to post some news, not that there is much to post.
A lot has been going on, it's Hell Week, what do you expect? I have been so tired and stressed that my shoulders feel like rocks. I don't like this much, it makes my nerves and self control go down the crapper. I don't like being upset at people and I especially don't like showing it, it always makes me feel bad.
You know what I don't understand? I don't get it when someone asks you to do something for them, even if it's a lot and out of your way, how you can be seen as the horrible one. There shouldn't even be a horrible one!
I did my good dead today, it made me happy and surprised Ash to no extend I think. We were walking into the Dollar Tree, the second time this week (urgh!), and there was an elderly couple with lots of groceries and they couldn't take the baskets outside. The mad was struggling to get everything and I felt really bad just walking away. I turned to them in the middle of telling a story and asked if they needed help. They were very surprised and happy. Ash and I helped them carry everything to their car and they were glad when they heard that we went to Drew. "Ah, Methodist." I didn't know how to take that but I am guessing that since many Methodists that I know are very nice and helping, it was just another good deed added to the list. I'm ok with that. It made me happy with myself.
So I am very happy with the piercings I got over Turkey break but I just keep reevaluating why I got them in the first place. It was out of the blue and took me less than a half hour to decide to get them, well, then I had to wait for three until my appointment rolled around. Before T-break, for some reason I ended up talking to him and he told me about his new ear piercings that he had finally gotten, two of them. He kinda sounded high and mighty... well, it was texting so maybe I was putting it in there... I don't see him with a piercing and he was always upset that I wanted to get piercings and didn't understand how he could be such a hypocrite. It is him though! Anyways, aside from wanting these things for the past two years, I also wanted a change, something that would break our tie and my love for him. Though I know that is actually not possible, I wanted something to symbolize it. I did the fastest, easiest, nonregretable thing. Cutting my hair would have probably been less painful but I so didn't want to do that. The only thing that is odd is that I have been wanting this for years and out of the blue, just because he gets his ear pierced, twice, I go and get an appointment, go to the parlor, and get pierced. I am glad I did it but still...
So, it's late and I have work to get done and have a few more hours to do it. I am getting so tired and am thinking about trying to find an anoying alarm on line so that I can have a continual noise to wake up to... I don't know if it will work.
Anyway... I should go and figure things out, many things!
Shmootchies!
A lot has been going on, it's Hell Week, what do you expect? I have been so tired and stressed that my shoulders feel like rocks. I don't like this much, it makes my nerves and self control go down the crapper. I don't like being upset at people and I especially don't like showing it, it always makes me feel bad.
You know what I don't understand? I don't get it when someone asks you to do something for them, even if it's a lot and out of your way, how you can be seen as the horrible one. There shouldn't even be a horrible one!
I did my good dead today, it made me happy and surprised Ash to no extend I think. We were walking into the Dollar Tree, the second time this week (urgh!), and there was an elderly couple with lots of groceries and they couldn't take the baskets outside. The mad was struggling to get everything and I felt really bad just walking away. I turned to them in the middle of telling a story and asked if they needed help. They were very surprised and happy. Ash and I helped them carry everything to their car and they were glad when they heard that we went to Drew. "Ah, Methodist." I didn't know how to take that but I am guessing that since many Methodists that I know are very nice and helping, it was just another good deed added to the list. I'm ok with that. It made me happy with myself.
So I am very happy with the piercings I got over Turkey break but I just keep reevaluating why I got them in the first place. It was out of the blue and took me less than a half hour to decide to get them, well, then I had to wait for three until my appointment rolled around. Before T-break, for some reason I ended up talking to him and he told me about his new ear piercings that he had finally gotten, two of them. He kinda sounded high and mighty... well, it was texting so maybe I was putting it in there... I don't see him with a piercing and he was always upset that I wanted to get piercings and didn't understand how he could be such a hypocrite. It is him though! Anyways, aside from wanting these things for the past two years, I also wanted a change, something that would break our tie and my love for him. Though I know that is actually not possible, I wanted something to symbolize it. I did the fastest, easiest, nonregretable thing. Cutting my hair would have probably been less painful but I so didn't want to do that. The only thing that is odd is that I have been wanting this for years and out of the blue, just because he gets his ear pierced, twice, I go and get an appointment, go to the parlor, and get pierced. I am glad I did it but still...
So, it's late and I have work to get done and have a few more hours to do it. I am getting so tired and am thinking about trying to find an anoying alarm on line so that I can have a continual noise to wake up to... I don't know if it will work.
Anyway... I should go and figure things out, many things!
Shmootchies!