nothing out of the extradinary
heylo...
Figured since I havent updated in a WHILE...that I probably should...so here it goes...
Summer came to a close and not soon enough, I never liked summer very much and still don't. It's a time of the year too many people over exaggerate about and then it ends up turning out NOTHING like you planned. Sound familar? Yes this summer was nothing short of that...I could have done without it.
The only thing that could have lasted long was my time with donny. He left me on August 23rd at 2pm...tears were shed, and lonesomeness set in REAL QUICK. I couldn't even look around the house without crying my eyes out. His dad and I spent the day together, and went to auntie karen's where the WHOLE FAMILY was like there...it was comforting because they are my family, but without donny it'll never be the same. I just laid in donny's mom's arms crying on the way home back to the house as Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon played. I couldnt believe he was gone...I kept trying to convince myself that he was just out with his recruiter and he'll be back later. As the night grew on, and I lay in his bed I knew he wasnt coming home. My mind kept playing tricks on me saying he was just downstairs on the computer but that was nothing more than an allusion. I awaited his phone call, just to hear his voice was all I needed...At around 10pm he finally called. It was no more than 15 mins before they were telling him to get off the phone...Right there and then I knew this was the next 5 years of our lives would be. Can we do this?
All I do know is no matter what I did, nothing helped. Erin even took me out with some friends of hers who were very nice, but that didn't help. I wasn't ready for donny to leave...My goodbyes weren't good enough. I needed more time...this wasnt right and I knew that it wouldnt be. My heart hadn't fully adjusted to him leaving, I needed like one more day or something.
I figured maybe sleep would help. I told Erin I was just going to sleep this off and I'd talk to her in the morning. Morning came, nothing changed...I should have known. I felt even worse if that were even possible. I just like DRAGGED myself out of bed and down the third floor stairs expecting to see him sitting on the computer...no donny...maybe the bathroom? Nope...still no donny...one last try...the kitchen...as I entered the kitchen I noticed no noise, nothing...just the kitchen with a few dirty dishes in the sink I was too lazy to do yesterday. Paul was bringing Dawn back to Vermont...so I was alone...I mean Erin was there but she sleeps till like 4pm...and it was 10am or so...I got upstairs and sit at the computer just staring at it...no more than 20 minutes had passed when I heard the doorbell...Emily went CRAZY!! I was like ah...fuck it I don't want to deal with anyone right now. Maybe they'll just go away. But Emily persisted...nudging me...doing EVERYTHING she could to get me to go downstairs...So just to shut her fucking mouth I did just that.
Prepared to tell whom ever was there I wasn't in the mood to hang out or even talk I opend the door face down. A familar voice said "Hey Girly!" my eyes moved up and it was DONNY! I pounced on him, almost knocking him off the porch. We held eachother for god 5 mins just crying and laughing...My dream came true...he was home...He kissed me and said "I'm all yours till 5pm!" *SMILES* I guess they screwed up his paper work so he couldnt leave for boot till the next day...soooo his recruiter asked where he'd want to go, and he said home, but he had to go back at 5.
Donny and I spent the whole afternoon together, just the 2 of us. It was the first time in a long time donny and I had a day like that, where nothing we did mattered just as long as we were together. I think that's what I needed. We shared a special connection before he left...and that I believe made everything ok for him to leave, and I could go on my way. We hugged, and kissed eachother goodbye and then I watched him walk out the door...and this time it was ok.
It's been 4 weeks and 2 days since he left...and it's less than a month till I get to go see my baby! His mommy, daddy and I are all driving out to ILLINOIS to see him Graduate on October 22nd. We leave on the 20th and stay till the 24th :) I cannot wait. It's been a long awaited reunion! I write to donny EVERY SINGLE DAY! He writes me ALL week and then sends me a letter on sunday morning. That's the only time they can send them, which sucks but is better than nothing. The first few letters were tear jerkers and I just wanted to destroy everything just to get to him and take him home with me. Even the phone call I got, which was 3 mins after 2 1/2 weeks of him being gone just made me want to die! But he sent me a letter this week and he asures me he's doing much better...things are starting to fall into place and to hear that just makes my heart fall at ease.
But besides all that...College is going on, it's rather boring, but it's also because it's such a simple semester. I work as a waitress at Gentelmen Farmers on Friday and Sunday's and now I work at EB GAMES At the Warwick mall which let me tell you kickes some motha fuckin ass!!!
But after Christmas I move down to waterbury FINALLY!! I really am doing it this time. i get the WHOLE third Floor and I get to decorate donny and my room. PAINTING IS WHAT MARGARET AND I SHALL BE DOING! I'm going to Nauguatuck Community College which is 1 mile from my house, and Dustin my manager at EB GAMES said he'll transfer me over to EB GAMES at the Waterbury Mall ... HOW FUCKING AWSOME IS THAT! come on now.
But for right now Dylan and I are staying at my MEMI'S AND PAPA's it's nice, but I need to get out of the middle of no where...
OH EVERYONE SAY CONGRADULATIONS TO RICKY BEANER!!! HE GOT A KICK ASS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!! *CLAPS*
hehe sorry bean I had to do it! cause I love ya!
well I'm off to do an english paper I keep putting off... TooDLeS!
Figured since I havent updated in a WHILE...that I probably should...so here it goes...
Summer came to a close and not soon enough, I never liked summer very much and still don't. It's a time of the year too many people over exaggerate about and then it ends up turning out NOTHING like you planned. Sound familar? Yes this summer was nothing short of that...I could have done without it.
The only thing that could have lasted long was my time with donny. He left me on August 23rd at 2pm...tears were shed, and lonesomeness set in REAL QUICK. I couldn't even look around the house without crying my eyes out. His dad and I spent the day together, and went to auntie karen's where the WHOLE FAMILY was like there...it was comforting because they are my family, but without donny it'll never be the same. I just laid in donny's mom's arms crying on the way home back to the house as Pink Floyd's Dark Side of the Moon played. I couldnt believe he was gone...I kept trying to convince myself that he was just out with his recruiter and he'll be back later. As the night grew on, and I lay in his bed I knew he wasnt coming home. My mind kept playing tricks on me saying he was just downstairs on the computer but that was nothing more than an allusion. I awaited his phone call, just to hear his voice was all I needed...At around 10pm he finally called. It was no more than 15 mins before they were telling him to get off the phone...Right there and then I knew this was the next 5 years of our lives would be. Can we do this?
All I do know is no matter what I did, nothing helped. Erin even took me out with some friends of hers who were very nice, but that didn't help. I wasn't ready for donny to leave...My goodbyes weren't good enough. I needed more time...this wasnt right and I knew that it wouldnt be. My heart hadn't fully adjusted to him leaving, I needed like one more day or something.
I figured maybe sleep would help. I told Erin I was just going to sleep this off and I'd talk to her in the morning. Morning came, nothing changed...I should have known. I felt even worse if that were even possible. I just like DRAGGED myself out of bed and down the third floor stairs expecting to see him sitting on the computer...no donny...maybe the bathroom? Nope...still no donny...one last try...the kitchen...as I entered the kitchen I noticed no noise, nothing...just the kitchen with a few dirty dishes in the sink I was too lazy to do yesterday. Paul was bringing Dawn back to Vermont...so I was alone...I mean Erin was there but she sleeps till like 4pm...and it was 10am or so...I got upstairs and sit at the computer just staring at it...no more than 20 minutes had passed when I heard the doorbell...Emily went CRAZY!! I was like ah...fuck it I don't want to deal with anyone right now. Maybe they'll just go away. But Emily persisted...nudging me...doing EVERYTHING she could to get me to go downstairs...So just to shut her fucking mouth I did just that.
Prepared to tell whom ever was there I wasn't in the mood to hang out or even talk I opend the door face down. A familar voice said "Hey Girly!" my eyes moved up and it was DONNY! I pounced on him, almost knocking him off the porch. We held eachother for god 5 mins just crying and laughing...My dream came true...he was home...He kissed me and said "I'm all yours till 5pm!" *SMILES* I guess they screwed up his paper work so he couldnt leave for boot till the next day...soooo his recruiter asked where he'd want to go, and he said home, but he had to go back at 5.
Donny and I spent the whole afternoon together, just the 2 of us. It was the first time in a long time donny and I had a day like that, where nothing we did mattered just as long as we were together. I think that's what I needed. We shared a special connection before he left...and that I believe made everything ok for him to leave, and I could go on my way. We hugged, and kissed eachother goodbye and then I watched him walk out the door...and this time it was ok.
It's been 4 weeks and 2 days since he left...and it's less than a month till I get to go see my baby! His mommy, daddy and I are all driving out to ILLINOIS to see him Graduate on October 22nd. We leave on the 20th and stay till the 24th :) I cannot wait. It's been a long awaited reunion! I write to donny EVERY SINGLE DAY! He writes me ALL week and then sends me a letter on sunday morning. That's the only time they can send them, which sucks but is better than nothing. The first few letters were tear jerkers and I just wanted to destroy everything just to get to him and take him home with me. Even the phone call I got, which was 3 mins after 2 1/2 weeks of him being gone just made me want to die! But he sent me a letter this week and he asures me he's doing much better...things are starting to fall into place and to hear that just makes my heart fall at ease.
But besides all that...College is going on, it's rather boring, but it's also because it's such a simple semester. I work as a waitress at Gentelmen Farmers on Friday and Sunday's and now I work at EB GAMES At the Warwick mall which let me tell you kickes some motha fuckin ass!!!
But after Christmas I move down to waterbury FINALLY!! I really am doing it this time. i get the WHOLE third Floor and I get to decorate donny and my room. PAINTING IS WHAT MARGARET AND I SHALL BE DOING! I'm going to Nauguatuck Community College which is 1 mile from my house, and Dustin my manager at EB GAMES said he'll transfer me over to EB GAMES at the Waterbury Mall ... HOW FUCKING AWSOME IS THAT! come on now.
But for right now Dylan and I are staying at my MEMI'S AND PAPA's it's nice, but I need to get out of the middle of no where...
OH EVERYONE SAY CONGRADULATIONS TO RICKY BEANER!!! HE GOT A KICK ASS GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!!!!! *CLAPS*
hehe sorry bean I had to do it! cause I love ya!
well I'm off to do an english paper I keep putting off... TooDLeS!