Since we were on the subject
Actually, we weren't. This is just me being up past my bedtime and listening to RuPaul on repeat.
I have two sincere phobias and one that I developed mostly because it seemed like everyone else had it and I guess I wanted to fit in. I don't wanna trigger anyone else's, so it's snakes, stuff under your skin, and inexplicable doors.
I never minded snakes as a kid. I mean, the whole legless thing they got going on weirds me a little bit, but I never had sincere phobias about them until sometime in my teens. I'm not sure why it happened except that maybe it's sorta expected for people to be creeped out by snakes? Whatever it is, in the amazing powers of the mind I actually have a physical reaction when I see a snake now, where my heart jumps up and I get sweaty and shaky and just can't handle it to the point of nausea. I guess it says a bit for the power of the mind that it's possible for that to happen nearly out of nowhere?
One of my sincere phobias is things moving under someone's skin. I can distinctly remember when I first realized I had this phobia, it was while watching a nature show when I was a kid and seeing those toads who hatch their babies out of their backs? It resulted in this vague discomfort that I could never fully explain, except that it seemed completely wrong to me. The second time it really hit me was in the Mummy, where those scarab beetles get under the guy's skin? That movie left me traumatized for years, and it resulted in a fully fledged phobia. I literally can not bear the thought of anything under my skin. If I have an ingrown hair I will pick until I am bleeding, same with zits. The zits that form under the skin without a head are the worst because there's no head to get to and I just have to keep going after it until it's completely flat to my skin. I know it'll scar and hurt and look horrible but I would rather bleed and scar than let that thing be under my skin for another fucking second. I was at a point when I was a teen where I couldn't even handle scabs for a while, but luckily I was able to get over that because obviously picking is gonna result in scabs.
The last one I have is the most inexplicable. I have no idea if other people have this one, I don't know if there's a word for it or anything. I just have this fear of doors where doors don't need to be.
That sounds weird when I write it out, but that's what it boils down to inside my head. When I see a door where it doesn't belong, where it isn't actually necessary in the room in the form of providing egress or something, I develop this intense paranoia about it. The Winchester house that has doors opening into walls and ceilings and stuff? That is the house from Hell for me, to the point where I have to leave the room if it's being shown on the TV, which is unfortunate because it is in ever haunted house show ever and I love haunted house shows.
You know those hotel rooms that have doors inside them that connect your room to the room next to it? I can't stay in those. I physically can not be in the same room with one of those doors. I once tried it, just to see if exposure could help me get over the weirdest phobia I have, but what actually happened was that I sat crosslegged on the bed until dawn, staring at the door, and then I booked it to the front desk and got a new room without the door and couldn't even go in to get my stuff--I had to have it moved.
I don't know what it stems from--if I'm scared that something is gonna come through the door or what? I don't think that it's that. I mean, when it's locked I know nothing can come through, and I'm obviously in no danger from a door on the TV. I think it's more just that there's something inside my head that says that there is something fundamentally wrong with a door where a door doesn't belong, or where it doesn't serve a purpose. It makes me ill inside, it makes me feel like there are things crawling over me and pretty much the only thought I'm capable of is I have to get away. I'm getting squirmy about it right now just sitting here, it's that strong to me.