Kingdom Hearts 2: God of War for the PG crowd
Man, there's so much wrong with Kingdom Heart2, but its so deliciously bad that I can't help but keep playing. KH2 is the exact opposite of a mediocre game, it is a game so ambitious that it vaulted over the bar for "good" straight into into the spikey ceiling of "Absurd" and "Xtreme"
It is actually perhaps one of the uniquely bad games I've ever played.
Action/Gameplay: Something went terribly wrong at Square-Enix or they just drank a shit load of Dew. This game is Xtreme to the triple X. It is literally one of the busiest games I've ever played. Within the first hour of real gameplay you'll have to deal with 4 or 5 different power-bars and a mini-encyclopedia of moves and information. The instructions for new gummi ship builder alone seemed like it was built to spec to service a modern aircraft.
I remember in the first game how exhilirating it was to get new moves and new summons. Each one was like a breath of fresh air to be savored and remembered. The problem with KH2 is that they just keep throwing a ginormous amount of things at you at breakneck speed. You stop caring about the next summon or special move you get because if you took time to care, you'd grind to a halt immediately. It's a game that really pushes you to mash buttons because anything else just seems like its getting in the way of the game.
Visuals: On that same note, this game is also incredibly busy visually. I cannot figure what's going on half the time. Buttons are pressed, Sora goes SSJ and some heartless gets mangled. But I'm mostly dizzy from all the action on the screen. Especially since the next reaction commands seem completey random. I really have no idea what Sora is going to do half the time, and while he's doing it.
Story: Pure Squaresoft. Convoluted, mysterious, and poorly paced. With the deadly mistake of stretching out a metaphor until it takes shape of a plot (Spirits Within). Has the extra tediousness of making you react entire Disney movies, but with less charm. Did I really need to relive Pirates of the Caribbean? People and enemies show up, say nonsense, and disappear with no regard.
Honestly, this game felt like it was made by 200 people, each allowed to add their own element of Overdrive Extreme Turbo Power to it.
It is actually perhaps one of the uniquely bad games I've ever played.
Action/Gameplay: Something went terribly wrong at Square-Enix or they just drank a shit load of Dew. This game is Xtreme to the triple X. It is literally one of the busiest games I've ever played. Within the first hour of real gameplay you'll have to deal with 4 or 5 different power-bars and a mini-encyclopedia of moves and information. The instructions for new gummi ship builder alone seemed like it was built to spec to service a modern aircraft.
I remember in the first game how exhilirating it was to get new moves and new summons. Each one was like a breath of fresh air to be savored and remembered. The problem with KH2 is that they just keep throwing a ginormous amount of things at you at breakneck speed. You stop caring about the next summon or special move you get because if you took time to care, you'd grind to a halt immediately. It's a game that really pushes you to mash buttons because anything else just seems like its getting in the way of the game.
Visuals: On that same note, this game is also incredibly busy visually. I cannot figure what's going on half the time. Buttons are pressed, Sora goes SSJ and some heartless gets mangled. But I'm mostly dizzy from all the action on the screen. Especially since the next reaction commands seem completey random. I really have no idea what Sora is going to do half the time, and while he's doing it.
Story: Pure Squaresoft. Convoluted, mysterious, and poorly paced. With the deadly mistake of stretching out a metaphor until it takes shape of a plot (Spirits Within). Has the extra tediousness of making you react entire Disney movies, but with less charm. Did I really need to relive Pirates of the Caribbean? People and enemies show up, say nonsense, and disappear with no regard.
Honestly, this game felt like it was made by 200 people, each allowed to add their own element of Overdrive Extreme Turbo Power to it.