(no subject)
i havent even looked at this journal in like 4 days and now my nose is completely out of everyones business. crap.
the whole brad & i situation isnt any better. if anything, its complete shit. why does it have to be so complicated? what the hell is wrong with me? what is up his butt? its like we are in the circus and everyone is in competition. no one should ever compete with their friends. WHY is there a competition between my friends and i? we are supposed to hang out and have fun but i always end up frustrated and fed up. why was i born a girl? insecurities are the ultimate evil. i can never escape mine. why are my friends so pretty? and why does that kill me? why do i have a problem accepting that being me and being unique is ok? why dont i think im pretty? why cant i get it right? why does everyone seem to treat my problems as if they are insignificant and can be answered with a simple solution? if i had a penny for every time someone told me that it was going to be 'ok' i would be rich. its getting pretty bad. everything is consuming me. i am simply a malfunction of my problems anymore. i never seem to find the time or the means to deal with all of it, or even a little bit. i dont even know if there available ears out there. ones that have the patience to listen and to comprehend and that dont just agree with me. does it ever seem like things couldnt possibly get worse and then they do? maybe i should forget about it. maybe its not so complicated. maybe i just need some love.
just say how to make this right and i swear ill do my best to comply.
acceptance letters are due in soon. there goes another dream.
congrats on your new car ash.
i want to take you far away from the cynics in this
town and kiss you on the mouth.
we'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of
this scene, start a brand new colony
where everything will change, we'll give
ourselves new names identities erased
the sun will heat the ground under our bare
feet in this brand new colony.
everything will change...
the whole brad & i situation isnt any better. if anything, its complete shit. why does it have to be so complicated? what the hell is wrong with me? what is up his butt? its like we are in the circus and everyone is in competition. no one should ever compete with their friends. WHY is there a competition between my friends and i? we are supposed to hang out and have fun but i always end up frustrated and fed up. why was i born a girl? insecurities are the ultimate evil. i can never escape mine. why are my friends so pretty? and why does that kill me? why do i have a problem accepting that being me and being unique is ok? why dont i think im pretty? why cant i get it right? why does everyone seem to treat my problems as if they are insignificant and can be answered with a simple solution? if i had a penny for every time someone told me that it was going to be 'ok' i would be rich. its getting pretty bad. everything is consuming me. i am simply a malfunction of my problems anymore. i never seem to find the time or the means to deal with all of it, or even a little bit. i dont even know if there available ears out there. ones that have the patience to listen and to comprehend and that dont just agree with me. does it ever seem like things couldnt possibly get worse and then they do? maybe i should forget about it. maybe its not so complicated. maybe i just need some love.
just say how to make this right and i swear ill do my best to comply.
acceptance letters are due in soon. there goes another dream.
congrats on your new car ash.
i want to take you far away from the cynics in this
town and kiss you on the mouth.
we'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of
this scene, start a brand new colony
where everything will change, we'll give
ourselves new names identities erased
the sun will heat the ground under our bare
feet in this brand new colony.
everything will change...