Despite the preponderance of evidence to the contrary, I am alive.
Well then.
I suppose I should begin with an apology for those of you who still remember me and an explanation of where I've been.
Firstly, I would like to point out that the inertia related to not posting or catching up online is *massive*. Secondly, Facebook and its ilk do not do much to assuage the fears. What do I mean by that?
"Jenny just blasted you with where she was at!!! DO YOU WANT TO BLAST PEEPS WITH WHERE YOU'RE AT?!?@!"
"Uh... Please no?"
"Just install WhereIt'sAtBLASTERv2.0 [acceptlolololol] [ignore]"
I mean, it's just that my newsfeed used to tell me all sorts of glorious things that my long lost friends or random internet acquaintances were up to. It was always very brief and pithy.
"Nate is happy"
"Jimmy added 'Asian food and cinema' to his interests"
"Tom changed his status to 'got fired for embezzlement'" <-- keeping it real, Veen style, btw.
"Josiah joined the group 'I once killed a man in cold blood'"
Who can argue with amazing cliff's notes of other people's lives like that? Now it's like opening my email inbox after that fateful September when AOL gave the internet to the people that education forgot. I actually feel like I'm just awaiting a punch to the sac every time I sit down at my computer.
In fact, while writing this I went to download and install aim (at the behest of a friend who I had previously not had any contact with for far, far too long, so you can't fault me for the install) and then I felt vindicated upon signing on.
Nick21773: yes, i logged onto aim SPECIFICALLY TO YELL AT YOU
Nick21773: stop sucking kthxbai
See, it's not paranoia when people confirm that they will actually sign on specifically and exclusively to accost you.
Though in fairness it's not just spam or facebook or fear of IMgasms that has kept me from the precious internet, a lot of it has just been me.
You see I actually have a lot less time and a lot more to do than I have ever had in history, and for a slacker like me, that's goddamed terrifying.
So what have I been up to that has precluded internets? Glad you asked.
I work as a third-party contractor for AT&T pimping out phones to the masses. iPhone or not, I will gladly declare that our shit is, as they say, heat. I am actually the stone nuts at this job and I am slaughtering sales. I even got my name on an actual plaque which I submit as exhibit A.
Sidenote: I got an 8525 with an infy data plan. It inspired me to attempt to blog while I was flying to San Diego [see later] but it turns out there is no internet at 30,000 feet and I didn't want to have to explain myself to four hundred pounds of Juan The Enforcer with the TSA when I landed.
When I'm not at work, I'm usually at home or at Jen's house, who if you don't know is the amazing, intelligent, and beautiful creature who has inexplicably decided to spend time around me and I'm lucky enough to call my own. Below is the Jen in her natural habitat.
My place is kickass. I'm living with Glenn again. Turns out that moving 450 miles [http://tinyurl.com/yq4gzp] just isn't far enough. The decor is almost 100% technology or stolen Magic tournament ornamentations. If it fits neither of those two categories, you sit on it or put things in it.
Speaking of Magic tournaments, there have been a lot of them recently. Alright, I just don't feel like finding a segue for this. I got to judge the Pro Tour. That's right, bitches. There is, in fact, a Magic: the Gathering Professional Tour, and I did, in fact, fly first class to San Diego and back to get paid to officiate it.
As only the Slim Jim King Macho Man Randy Savage can put it:
Ooooooh Yeeeeeeeee-uh!
There could be endless additional photo posts of foils, heads of the DCI in incriminating/embarrassing situations, etc, but I'll just leave it at the pretty scenery.
Right now I'm just glad I finally posted. There are certainly more topics of a serious variety, like the meanderings of my mind in the wee hours of the morning, nostalgia for the people and places of .mi, the windfall of cash I happened into based entirely on what seems to be the parentally visible failings of my little brother, and just various musings on life and *gasp* growing up. In fact, all of those things would have been here if the internet was more cooperative. But instead I was forced to blows, and now it's 2:30AM. And with that I say:
Fuck it.
--Veen
P.S. Yeah, it's been a long time. Yes I know this isn't facebook or myspace. Yes I do want comments. Yes, I will probably post again if this gets positive replies. Yes, your mom did look really hot in that dress.
P.P.S. Glenn told me, and I was very close to doing so, to call this post "Win the Girl, Kill all the Bad Guys"
P.P.P.S. Poker and the irc'ers (or anyone who gets the reference) There's still a dollar if you get the reference from this PT:SD picture.
Because, y'know, you gotta take the elevator to the mezzanine...
I suppose I should begin with an apology for those of you who still remember me and an explanation of where I've been.
Firstly, I would like to point out that the inertia related to not posting or catching up online is *massive*. Secondly, Facebook and its ilk do not do much to assuage the fears. What do I mean by that?
"Jenny just blasted you with where she was at!!! DO YOU WANT TO BLAST PEEPS WITH WHERE YOU'RE AT?!?@!"
"Uh... Please no?"
"Just install WhereIt'sAtBLASTERv2.0 [acceptlolololol] [ignore]"
I mean, it's just that my newsfeed used to tell me all sorts of glorious things that my long lost friends or random internet acquaintances were up to. It was always very brief and pithy.
"Nate is happy"
"Jimmy added 'Asian food and cinema' to his interests"
"Tom changed his status to 'got fired for embezzlement'" <-- keeping it real, Veen style, btw.
"Josiah joined the group 'I once killed a man in cold blood'"
Who can argue with amazing cliff's notes of other people's lives like that? Now it's like opening my email inbox after that fateful September when AOL gave the internet to the people that education forgot. I actually feel like I'm just awaiting a punch to the sac every time I sit down at my computer.
In fact, while writing this I went to download and install aim (at the behest of a friend who I had previously not had any contact with for far, far too long, so you can't fault me for the install) and then I felt vindicated upon signing on.
Nick21773: yes, i logged onto aim SPECIFICALLY TO YELL AT YOU
Nick21773: stop sucking kthxbai
See, it's not paranoia when people confirm that they will actually sign on specifically and exclusively to accost you.
Though in fairness it's not just spam or facebook or fear of IMgasms that has kept me from the precious internet, a lot of it has just been me.
You see I actually have a lot less time and a lot more to do than I have ever had in history, and for a slacker like me, that's goddamed terrifying.
So what have I been up to that has precluded internets? Glad you asked.
I work as a third-party contractor for AT&T pimping out phones to the masses. iPhone or not, I will gladly declare that our shit is, as they say, heat. I am actually the stone nuts at this job and I am slaughtering sales. I even got my name on an actual plaque which I submit as exhibit A.
Sidenote: I got an 8525 with an infy data plan. It inspired me to attempt to blog while I was flying to San Diego [see later] but it turns out there is no internet at 30,000 feet and I didn't want to have to explain myself to four hundred pounds of Juan The Enforcer with the TSA when I landed.
When I'm not at work, I'm usually at home or at Jen's house, who if you don't know is the amazing, intelligent, and beautiful creature who has inexplicably decided to spend time around me and I'm lucky enough to call my own. Below is the Jen in her natural habitat.
My place is kickass. I'm living with Glenn again. Turns out that moving 450 miles [http://tinyurl.com/yq4gzp] just isn't far enough. The decor is almost 100% technology or stolen Magic tournament ornamentations. If it fits neither of those two categories, you sit on it or put things in it.
Speaking of Magic tournaments, there have been a lot of them recently. Alright, I just don't feel like finding a segue for this. I got to judge the Pro Tour. That's right, bitches. There is, in fact, a Magic: the Gathering Professional Tour, and I did, in fact, fly first class to San Diego and back to get paid to officiate it.
As only the Slim Jim King Macho Man Randy Savage can put it:
Ooooooh Yeeeeeeeee-uh!
There could be endless additional photo posts of foils, heads of the DCI in incriminating/embarrassing situations, etc, but I'll just leave it at the pretty scenery.
Right now I'm just glad I finally posted. There are certainly more topics of a serious variety, like the meanderings of my mind in the wee hours of the morning, nostalgia for the people and places of .mi, the windfall of cash I happened into based entirely on what seems to be the parentally visible failings of my little brother, and just various musings on life and *gasp* growing up. In fact, all of those things would have been here if the internet was more cooperative. But instead I was forced to blows, and now it's 2:30AM. And with that I say:
Fuck it.
--Veen
P.S. Yeah, it's been a long time. Yes I know this isn't facebook or myspace. Yes I do want comments. Yes, I will probably post again if this gets positive replies. Yes, your mom did look really hot in that dress.
P.P.S. Glenn told me, and I was very close to doing so, to call this post "Win the Girl, Kill all the Bad Guys"
P.P.P.S. Poker and the irc'ers (or anyone who gets the reference) There's still a dollar if you get the reference from this PT:SD picture.
Because, y'know, you gotta take the elevator to the mezzanine...