The College Graduate
That would be me. Yesterday, in a ceremony of much pomp and circumstance signifying nothing, I became a college graduate. Or faked becoming a college graduate, or whatever. I guess you aren't really until your "degree is conferred," which won't be for a couple weeks, so at the very least I have the appearance of being a college grad.
And now I sit. I'm going to kill myself this month before I leave for training in Atlanta during the first week of June. I'm already bored and working on depression, and it's been a day.
Thankfully I'll start working next week--my final three weeks at Barnes and Noble (fake tears)--and hopefully that will help ebb the tide of some of this mental flotsam/jetsam.
But I see myself being sad and melancholy for at least the next....who knows how long. However long it takes...I'm going to enter mysterious mode here...but it'll take a while to work through and definitely a while to get over or get control of. Not sure I'll ever get over it. It'll stick with me for a long while, I imagine.
So, in the meantime, two songs I can't listen to for threat of tears: If You Ain't Got Love - Mason Jennings, particularly the lines: "And from out in the water, you called me to join you, and I said baby I cannot swim if I jump, I'll surely drown you, and you said 'life has no limit, if you're not afraid to get in it,' and ooo baby I jumped to you, and since then there's nothing I can't do, I'm never gonna give you up, what do you got if you ain't got love?" and I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You - Colin Hay, particularly the lines, "Your face it dances and it haunts me, your laughter ringing in my ears, I still find pieces of your presence here, even after all these years." and of course, "And if I should live until I was one-hundred and two, I just don't think I'll ever get over you."
And that's that...the end of an era. The beginning of something new, on so many fronts. Too much new, too quickly...I may lose myself.
And now I sit. I'm going to kill myself this month before I leave for training in Atlanta during the first week of June. I'm already bored and working on depression, and it's been a day.
Thankfully I'll start working next week--my final three weeks at Barnes and Noble (fake tears)--and hopefully that will help ebb the tide of some of this mental flotsam/jetsam.
But I see myself being sad and melancholy for at least the next....who knows how long. However long it takes...I'm going to enter mysterious mode here...but it'll take a while to work through and definitely a while to get over or get control of. Not sure I'll ever get over it. It'll stick with me for a long while, I imagine.
So, in the meantime, two songs I can't listen to for threat of tears: If You Ain't Got Love - Mason Jennings, particularly the lines: "And from out in the water, you called me to join you, and I said baby I cannot swim if I jump, I'll surely drown you, and you said 'life has no limit, if you're not afraid to get in it,' and ooo baby I jumped to you, and since then there's nothing I can't do, I'm never gonna give you up, what do you got if you ain't got love?" and I Just Don't Think I'll Ever Get Over You - Colin Hay, particularly the lines, "Your face it dances and it haunts me, your laughter ringing in my ears, I still find pieces of your presence here, even after all these years." and of course, "And if I should live until I was one-hundred and two, I just don't think I'll ever get over you."
And that's that...the end of an era. The beginning of something new, on so many fronts. Too much new, too quickly...I may lose myself.