YAWN
I'm feeding Jaden and talking to a friend I haven't talked to in forever! She and her boyfriend broke- I feel bad b/c she thought they were going to get married and she's sad. I hate when things like that happen- I'm so thankful I'm married when I hear my friends worried about b/f's and stuff. Jaden is great- she's a month old! Levi & I are looking to buy a house, and things are just overall great. I'm still tired as hell and want to stay home and not go back to work, but what am I going to do? Things are kind of in ups right now- Levi's still not so sure what to do about a job... go to the Reserves, go Active duty again, go contract and go to Iraq for a year, stay w/ his job and get his A&P, or test for the police department next month... he says it's my decision, but it's his career- not mine... what to do what to do?!?! Guys are so complicated- I need a magic ball or a brain reader or something so I could figure out what he really wants. He never has an opinion on things that really matter b/c he doesn't want to make me upset or mad.. and I'm so fincky and indecisive (sp) I know it annoys him but yikes! He knew I was like that when he married me- he's supposed to be the man and take charge, well when I want him to. I'm perfectly content to let him make all the important decisions- I know that sounds weird, but that's how my dad was w/ my mom- he made the decisions, he was the MAN, I'm sure he consulted her, but it was him. She cleaned and took care of the house. Dad retired when I was in 6th grade so he did the cooking and laundry, but everything else was mom. It was kind of old fashioned, but backwards a bit b/c of him being retired. I miss my father, I hate that he's gone- I really do- I'm glad he's not in pain, but I miss him so much, and my kids will never know him- it sucks ass. I better go to sleep, if I stay up and keep typing I'm going to get emotional and this post will turn sad. Good Night. I hope everyone is well... *hugs* to all of those who aren't with their significant others.