I was confused by the powers that be...
So, the gist of it is I ended up ranting about everything to my FATHER, of all people, and consequently my mother because, you know, she's got dramatic radar, and the highlights of the conversation were:
"I miss Francesca. I miss my friends, yeah, but I don't like how emotionally dependent on them I am. And my problem is that I'm here, alone, and I don't have Mom and Dad to take care of me like everybody else does. So I'm scared of speaking up when anything's wrong because I think it'll cause me to lose the people that give me affection. And some things are wrong, you know? And I just let her get away with it. "
"Can somebody get me cake? Because it's been a year of not throwing up?" (Officially, it will be a year on January 1st, 2010. But the fight against bulimia has been an ongoing struggle ever since I was seventeen. 2008, post Paris, was when I'd decided to never give in to it again.)
"And while we're at it, sexuality is fluid. I like girls. I like boys. The problem is that right now, I don't like ANYTHING! Don't you think it's strange, knowing me?"
I freaked them out. Hell, I freaked myself out. I think we're fine, the context was somehow bigger and more important, which means it needed to take precedence over everything else.
"I miss Francesca. I miss my friends, yeah, but I don't like how emotionally dependent on them I am. And my problem is that I'm here, alone, and I don't have Mom and Dad to take care of me like everybody else does. So I'm scared of speaking up when anything's wrong because I think it'll cause me to lose the people that give me affection. And some things are wrong, you know? And I just let her get away with it. "
"Can somebody get me cake? Because it's been a year of not throwing up?" (Officially, it will be a year on January 1st, 2010. But the fight against bulimia has been an ongoing struggle ever since I was seventeen. 2008, post Paris, was when I'd decided to never give in to it again.)
"And while we're at it, sexuality is fluid. I like girls. I like boys. The problem is that right now, I don't like ANYTHING! Don't you think it's strange, knowing me?"
I freaked them out. Hell, I freaked myself out. I think we're fine, the context was somehow bigger and more important, which means it needed to take precedence over everything else.