(no subject)
I called XBox and they want me to spend 120 dollars to get my 360 fixed. I was so mad for about 20 minutes, and annoyed with everyone because they were telling me "Buy a new one instead!!" I don't... have the money to buy a new one. I don't even have the money to buy myself a new coat for winter, or even new clothes for that matter. I have 2 pairs of pants. A pair of leggings. Some boots my mom just got me and a pair of flip flops.
I feel so pathetic, and all the sudden everything started crashing on me at once: and I absolutely hated myself for not having a job, or a stable home, being fat and ugly, and having absolutely no one to turn to... because I brought this all on myself. I cried, and I cried, and even after I swore I couldn't cry anymore the tears kept coming out and I just kept sobbing and wishing I was dead.
It feels like the universe just took a huge dump on me. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
I wanted to go see Dru for Christmas, just because I know Christmas would be even more worse and pathetic than last year, and I didn't think that was possible. With my brother gone, it'd just be my dad and I. First mom, and then brandon.
I don't think I'm done being emo, so I'm just going to work out to blow some steam off, maybe cry some more, and watch a movie downstairs. Idk. What a bad week.