You Belong With Me: Part One
Oh I remember you driving to my house in the middle of the night
I'm the one who makes you laugh when you know you're about to cry
I know your favorite songs and you tell me about your dreams
I think I know where you belong. I think I know it's with me.
Can't you see that I'm the one who understand you?
Been here all along so why can't you see?
You belong with me
Taylor Swift
You Belong With Me: Part One
This had been a bad idea.
When he had brought it up, going on a camping trip with Sam for his high school graduation, it had seemed like a damn good idea. The two of them, up in the hills, a fire, some beer, fishing in the morning...seemed like the perfect thing. Ever since John had stumbled in on the two of them and threatened to throw Dean out if he caught them together again, Dean had distanced himself from Sam in just about every possible. He hadn't told Sam what had happened with John and it had affected their relationship in every sense of the word.
So them, getting away so he could explain it to Sam and let him know that it wasn't his idea to back off...maybe it would change things between them. Maybe.
Dean had never been quite that wrong before.
When Dean had brought it up Sam had looked at him with those piercing eyes that seemed to have way more wisdom than an eighteen year old teenager should. Though older than him, Dean never possessed the same sense of knowing and poise that his little brother had. Even Chace, their younger step brother , seemed to be more comfortable in his skin than Dean was. So with Sam staring into his soul Dean actually looked away for a moment from the gaze.
“Just the two of us?” he asked.
Dean had looked up quickly “Yeah of course.”
“No Chace? No girls waiting for us at the lake?” the questions were rational and calm, but Dean could feel the underlining steel that was just below the surface.
Dean shook his head quickly “No, I meant just us.”
Sam was silent for a moment and then nodded his head “Ok”
And Dean had thought that had been that.
That had definitely not been that.
The week leading up to the graduation Sam had become even more withdrawn and silent, to the point that even John had noticed and asked him if something was wrong. Which got a sullen shake of his head as he went back to picking at dinner. Sam not eating, a sure sign something was not right.
Dean had learned the hard way, the best way to get Sam to talk was to leave him alone and let him come at it himself. Pushing or prodding only clammed him up even more, and the wait would have been even longer. So Dean said nothing to his brother as they slept in the renovated attic that doubled as their room. They had changed for sleep without a word, Dean slipping his black boxer shorts on and climbing into bed without even a good night. He figured whatever it was they would get to it on the camping trip.
He hoped because a weekend up on the hill with Sam doing a Harpo Marx routine would be a new level of hell.
The week had slipped by and before Dean knew it he was watching Sam accept his diploma up on stage, the long gown not quite reaching the middle of his shins from his insane height. Dean was blown away that this 6'2” strapping high school graduate was the same gawky kid who would crawl into bed with him after watching Nightmare on Elm Street with Dean after midnight. When had he become this? When had he become a man?
And what did that make Dean?
John took them out to dinner after, Chace seemed more excited than Sam since he was going to be the only Winchester in high school now. As they waited for their meal Dean leaned over to Sam “You wanna take off after this?”
Sam didn't glance over to him he just nodded slightly and went back to picking at his food. John commented that Sam wasn't acting like someone who just graduated top of his class with relative ease. Sam gave him what Dean recognized as his fake smile and pretended to cheer up for the rest of the meal, but Dean knew. Dean always knew.
Something was wrong.
Chace whined that it was unfair that he couldn't go with him in the parking lot but John mercifully said that this was Dean's gift to Sam and that if Chace wanted he could go hang out with his friends the Scott brothers he could, but that the brothers were going alone. Dean was thankful for that.
As Sam climbed into Dean's truck John pulled his oldest aside “Find out why he looks like someone just killed his dog will you? I honestly thought he would be...”
“I know dad.” Dean said cutting him off “I'll find out.”
John stared at Dean for a long second, his eyes warning Dean that in no way should he try to make a move on Sam again in no uncertain terms he would be thrown out on the street in no time flat. Dean just looked away and sighed, wishing his dad would just back off.
Dean climbed into the truck and slammed the door in frustration. He turned the truck over as Sam asked “Everything ok?”
“Just fine.” Dean said through gritted teeth as he sped out of the parking lot.
They were silent for the rest of the trip.
It was going to be a long weekend.