Ashamed
I'm so ashamed of my father. That is maybe the reason I want to leave this house. Lies, deception. How can a person live in a place like this?
I should start at the beginning. After my mom passed away, my father started drinking again. He doesn't get mean, he just makes really really bad choices. Like cheating on my mom when I was just a little girl. But when my mom told him she wanted a divorce he sobered up. Now he's back to drinking and he's hiding things from me.
Like when I got back from AIT I found a small metal rod in the shower that ended up being a dildo. I let that pass, because I was hoping it was their for his perssonel pleasure.
But then when my unit got called up he came to visit me at Fort Lewis. He told me he had a business meeting in Seattle. A business meeting my ass. He did came to see me, but after he dropped me off at company area he told me he went to see the person that he had cheated on my mom with. Must of been some business meeting. I still have not forgiven him on that one.
Today, I wanted to use the video camera and there was a tape in it. Thinking it was the tape that my little brother used when he went on a repaling trip I took a look at it. I am now scared permanently from what I had seen. I saw my dad and another women about to have sex.
Once I realized what was going on I through the camera. It was totally disgusting. It hurts me that my father would not do something like this, but keeping it from me. I need to get out of this house or I'm going to go insane and do something that I don't want to do. He needs help.
I should start at the beginning. After my mom passed away, my father started drinking again. He doesn't get mean, he just makes really really bad choices. Like cheating on my mom when I was just a little girl. But when my mom told him she wanted a divorce he sobered up. Now he's back to drinking and he's hiding things from me.
Like when I got back from AIT I found a small metal rod in the shower that ended up being a dildo. I let that pass, because I was hoping it was their for his perssonel pleasure.
But then when my unit got called up he came to visit me at Fort Lewis. He told me he had a business meeting in Seattle. A business meeting my ass. He did came to see me, but after he dropped me off at company area he told me he went to see the person that he had cheated on my mom with. Must of been some business meeting. I still have not forgiven him on that one.
Today, I wanted to use the video camera and there was a tape in it. Thinking it was the tape that my little brother used when he went on a repaling trip I took a look at it. I am now scared permanently from what I had seen. I saw my dad and another women about to have sex.
Once I realized what was going on I through the camera. It was totally disgusting. It hurts me that my father would not do something like this, but keeping it from me. I need to get out of this house or I'm going to go insane and do something that I don't want to do. He needs help.