Hello, LJ...
In this crazy life, mixed with ups and downs, I've found myself back to you. You who were at least partially implicated in my downfall at RIT; who ushered in a new era of e-stalking and digital bickering. Venting my frustrations online, semi-anonymous and yet clearly transparent... that is what you are to me.
A go to place for my mind. I haven't talked to you in a while. Perhaps it's because I've slowly grown into this life I've developed; perhaps it's because I'm not as emotional as I used to be. In fact... I sometimes feel like I'm devoid of emotion entirely. I get angry, and frustrated, and laugh; but not nearly the way I used to.
I can't even write the same as I once could - granted, I'm at work. But how could I write when I get home? It's... difficult.
I miss you. I miss the way we were. Our talks, ramblings, the ups and downs... I feel like I had a much better connection with you than I ever will with Twitter, or Facebook. But I like having my ideas heard - I don't know if they are here. But do I want them to be?
I've lost all my places to go, LJ. I have to fight just to be what I want to be, and I censor myself every step of the way. And I still wonder, how are those I've lost touch with. Do they even wonder the same? I guess I'll never really know.
A go to place for my mind. I haven't talked to you in a while. Perhaps it's because I've slowly grown into this life I've developed; perhaps it's because I'm not as emotional as I used to be. In fact... I sometimes feel like I'm devoid of emotion entirely. I get angry, and frustrated, and laugh; but not nearly the way I used to.
I can't even write the same as I once could - granted, I'm at work. But how could I write when I get home? It's... difficult.
I miss you. I miss the way we were. Our talks, ramblings, the ups and downs... I feel like I had a much better connection with you than I ever will with Twitter, or Facebook. But I like having my ideas heard - I don't know if they are here. But do I want them to be?
I've lost all my places to go, LJ. I have to fight just to be what I want to be, and I censor myself every step of the way. And I still wonder, how are those I've lost touch with. Do they even wonder the same? I guess I'll never really know.