Peanut Butter Jelly Time!
For some reason I feel strangely compelled to clear up the air regarding certain bread, peanut, and fruit based meals, vis-a-vis, PB&J.
In the attempts to further this cause, I present the following as my standards for true peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
1. Crunchy is the only kind of real peanut butter. Creamy is only acceptable if no crunchy is around.
2. Cutting the crust off the bread is unacceptable for anyone over the age of ten years old.
3. If the bread is cut, it shall only be cut along the diagonal to allow for maximum edge-munching.
4. Thou shall not start in the middle, soft part of the bread. No matter how tasty it is, it should be left for last for maximal enjoyment.
5. When making the sandwich, put the peanut butter on first, then the jelly, so not to get jelly in the peanut butter.
6. Jelly is to be refridgerated. Peanut butter is not.
7. There are more flavors to jelly than just grape and strawberry. Try them.
8. One sandwich is a snack. Two sandwiches is a meal. Three sandwiches is a ultimate champion status.
9. Always be sure to spread all the way to the crust, or it will not be tasty.
10. Stealing another's PB&J is punishable by death. Sharing your PB&J, however, brings you close to godliness.
As always these rules are open to debate and discourse should you not agree.
In the attempts to further this cause, I present the following as my standards for true peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.
1. Crunchy is the only kind of real peanut butter. Creamy is only acceptable if no crunchy is around.
2. Cutting the crust off the bread is unacceptable for anyone over the age of ten years old.
3. If the bread is cut, it shall only be cut along the diagonal to allow for maximum edge-munching.
4. Thou shall not start in the middle, soft part of the bread. No matter how tasty it is, it should be left for last for maximal enjoyment.
5. When making the sandwich, put the peanut butter on first, then the jelly, so not to get jelly in the peanut butter.
6. Jelly is to be refridgerated. Peanut butter is not.
7. There are more flavors to jelly than just grape and strawberry. Try them.
8. One sandwich is a snack. Two sandwiches is a meal. Three sandwiches is a ultimate champion status.
9. Always be sure to spread all the way to the crust, or it will not be tasty.
10. Stealing another's PB&J is punishable by death. Sharing your PB&J, however, brings you close to godliness.
As always these rules are open to debate and discourse should you not agree.