i always had a grip on everything, it feels good to let go..im not over you
" Sometimes love isn't about how much someone suits you
but how much you're willing to change to suit them".
Spring break is almost over, it was decent i guess i really didn't do much but get on yet another fucked up sleeping pattern but ill deal, i think i slept more then ever, like today i slept till 3p.m but really there wasn't much for me to get up for plus i love just laying in bed with ben and my ipod; kinda looking forward to going back to school, not that i am interested in it all that much but it gives me something to do thats useful and its going to make time go by faster until summer.
I really feel as if my body is against me, the one time i want to gain weight of course its a pain in the ass so instead of gaining it through eating a shit load of food, i have decided to gain it through muscle..
making my ass get up and working out has been a real task but I'm actually enjoying it, sometimes.
trying to move on, better myself and stop being so bitter and hurt but some times i really cant help it.
I think most of my problem is living here in this place, maybe every place sucks when your 17, jobless and license-less but i honestly believe even if i had a car and a job it would still suck, i would just have my own money, which I'm working on. It really fucking sucks when the person or persons you care most about are half way across the country, I'm stuck for about another year or so. I just hope this summer i can get the hell away from here, i really could careless where i go as long as i don't have to stay here because i am going crazy and i am already crazy.
off to apply for this job and some homework..what fun!
summer come on!!!
but how much you're willing to change to suit them".
Spring break is almost over, it was decent i guess i really didn't do much but get on yet another fucked up sleeping pattern but ill deal, i think i slept more then ever, like today i slept till 3p.m but really there wasn't much for me to get up for plus i love just laying in bed with ben and my ipod; kinda looking forward to going back to school, not that i am interested in it all that much but it gives me something to do thats useful and its going to make time go by faster until summer.
I really feel as if my body is against me, the one time i want to gain weight of course its a pain in the ass so instead of gaining it through eating a shit load of food, i have decided to gain it through muscle..
making my ass get up and working out has been a real task but I'm actually enjoying it, sometimes.
trying to move on, better myself and stop being so bitter and hurt but some times i really cant help it.
I think most of my problem is living here in this place, maybe every place sucks when your 17, jobless and license-less but i honestly believe even if i had a car and a job it would still suck, i would just have my own money, which I'm working on. It really fucking sucks when the person or persons you care most about are half way across the country, I'm stuck for about another year or so. I just hope this summer i can get the hell away from here, i really could careless where i go as long as i don't have to stay here because i am going crazy and i am already crazy.
off to apply for this job and some homework..what fun!
summer come on!!!