May 02, 2005 21:44
so a couple of months ago..we got word that Loney was goin down to FL for college....you kno, im excited for him...everyone is...but its like tha more i think about it, i dont want him to leave...he's like tha 1 person that can keep me goin..he alwayz tells me to keep my head up and go for wat i want...he's been there for me thru everythang possible...i love him so much...and now people are tellin me that i can make it thru senior year wit flyin colors, as long as you got that one person there that will help you thru it all....but tha one person that will help me thru it, is leavin this summer...yeah i kno he'll only be a phone call away, but it wont be tha same...no longer will we drive around in his truck, bumpin wit tha blue light..
or call each otha big ass head...bug each other till it pisses mom n dad off...argue over somethang so little, and then laugh about it later...stayin up late and watchin movies....i cant tell him how i feel, b/c i dont want him to worry about me...i want him to go to college and not look back, ukno? i kno he's gona do big in life...he has a great heart and an awesome personality...i guess wat im tryin to say...is i dont think ima make it thru senior year without him...he wont be here to help me thru anythang...if mom n dad are on my back..he wont be here to stick up for me...everythang is gona be on me now...
i dont kno how ima be able to get on that plane wen we leave from Florida to come back to Michigan in August...i kno i gota keep my head up and not cry...i kno i gota be strong for him and my mom...it almost feels like a part of me is leavin...i kno i wont be tha same witout my brother...
Loney, if you read this...i love you so much....good luck at college...i kno you'll do awesome! cant wait to see you make Officer :) call me WENEVER you need anythang, and i'll do tha same...alwayz remember that ima be here for you! i dont wana see you leave tho...its gona be hard...but after i graduate, hopefully i can go down there too and be wit tha ~Fab 4~ cuz you kno how we do! i love you big ass head!!
**had to speak my mind...i kno it mite not be totally 100% clear and there's more i gota say...but i'll wait a lil longer for me to say tha rest....