This Journal Entry is brought to you in thanks to Sierra
This term has SUCKED!! It ended at 2:00 today.
Mexico was awesome...then sucked, now is awesome again.
Living with Johnny is amazing I love it! Except those weeks when I only saw him on the other side of the pillow or was too stressed out to enjoy seeing him. I won't lie, its been an adjustment. We share, like, everything. Or so it feels and getting time to myself where I can just vegetate and not do homework or study or apply to graduate schools has been had to come by.
I don't know how I would have gotten through this term without him around, I probably would have cut my wrist...I've had one too many break downs. I'm pretty sure I've got really bad anxiety. The graduate class, process for applying, and all those other little project have just wore me down.
Almost done with my first application finally though. Anybody up for some last minute editing? ???
I didn't think so, its not my top choice anymore, but I would like to get in (to ASU that is).
I would like to get in anywhere.
So I'm just a lot of paperwork away from enjoying myself.
We're off to california so I can check out San Jose State and San Francisco State, visit Johnny's friend real quick and rush back up here thru the passes to catch our plane to Lousiana to visit my grandad (i'm not too excited about the rushing part, but johnny's friend is only gunna be there the day before our flight).
Christmas with Johnnny's parents, just like thanksgiving. because my mother is homeless and soon to be moving into what I can only describe as a "treehouse". Well, that's what it reminds me of. She's happy, if you haven't heard the story, I'll gladly tell. It was emotional but now just kinda funny. I can't stand her hippie boyfriend for that long though, not sure why yet.
I got into an arguement with two friends the other night about plastic surgery and that they shouldn't get it. One is dead set on a nose job and the other a boob job. I have parts of my body I don't care for, but holy shit girls. Plastic surgery? please tell i'm not the only one who thinks it just makes you look fake? It pissed me off how shallow and superficial they were about it. "If you're gunna do it it has to be for the right reasons, it has to be for yourself" I'm still pissed. I've had a difficult time being one of these girls friends for awhile now, she's a good person and good company but she went through something dramatic a few years ago and has never been the same. Now she's condescending, sluttly, and apparently needs a boob job. I'm questioning how I can hang around these people. What was worse was Johnny was at home being sick, the two boys that were there were no help, and I wanted some back up that their bodies don't require and chopping. We're suppose to go to Vegas with them Spring Break. i dont' want to anymore, its not just this one thing either. They make me feel bad about myself. I don't wear enough makeup, heals, expensive clothing, ....throw up on purpose, steal from Holister. Johnny says it'll still be fun. I'm starting to think friend like these should not be friends. But I guess, I'll get over it, I seem to keep hanging out with them.
Maybe I'll get some Mischa advice.
I miss Mischa, i love living with johnny but I NEED more time with her. She's the most positive female influence I've ever had in my life and my best friend.
Sierra, I'll dedicate a more senseful making entry to you in the future, this one sounds like its on drugs.
Mexico was awesome...then sucked, now is awesome again.
Living with Johnny is amazing I love it! Except those weeks when I only saw him on the other side of the pillow or was too stressed out to enjoy seeing him. I won't lie, its been an adjustment. We share, like, everything. Or so it feels and getting time to myself where I can just vegetate and not do homework or study or apply to graduate schools has been had to come by.
I don't know how I would have gotten through this term without him around, I probably would have cut my wrist...I've had one too many break downs. I'm pretty sure I've got really bad anxiety. The graduate class, process for applying, and all those other little project have just wore me down.
Almost done with my first application finally though. Anybody up for some last minute editing? ???
I didn't think so, its not my top choice anymore, but I would like to get in (to ASU that is).
I would like to get in anywhere.
So I'm just a lot of paperwork away from enjoying myself.
We're off to california so I can check out San Jose State and San Francisco State, visit Johnny's friend real quick and rush back up here thru the passes to catch our plane to Lousiana to visit my grandad (i'm not too excited about the rushing part, but johnny's friend is only gunna be there the day before our flight).
Christmas with Johnnny's parents, just like thanksgiving. because my mother is homeless and soon to be moving into what I can only describe as a "treehouse". Well, that's what it reminds me of. She's happy, if you haven't heard the story, I'll gladly tell. It was emotional but now just kinda funny. I can't stand her hippie boyfriend for that long though, not sure why yet.
I got into an arguement with two friends the other night about plastic surgery and that they shouldn't get it. One is dead set on a nose job and the other a boob job. I have parts of my body I don't care for, but holy shit girls. Plastic surgery? please tell i'm not the only one who thinks it just makes you look fake? It pissed me off how shallow and superficial they were about it. "If you're gunna do it it has to be for the right reasons, it has to be for yourself" I'm still pissed. I've had a difficult time being one of these girls friends for awhile now, she's a good person and good company but she went through something dramatic a few years ago and has never been the same. Now she's condescending, sluttly, and apparently needs a boob job. I'm questioning how I can hang around these people. What was worse was Johnny was at home being sick, the two boys that were there were no help, and I wanted some back up that their bodies don't require and chopping. We're suppose to go to Vegas with them Spring Break. i dont' want to anymore, its not just this one thing either. They make me feel bad about myself. I don't wear enough makeup, heals, expensive clothing, ....throw up on purpose, steal from Holister. Johnny says it'll still be fun. I'm starting to think friend like these should not be friends. But I guess, I'll get over it, I seem to keep hanging out with them.
Maybe I'll get some Mischa advice.
I miss Mischa, i love living with johnny but I NEED more time with her. She's the most positive female influence I've ever had in my life and my best friend.
Sierra, I'll dedicate a more senseful making entry to you in the future, this one sounds like its on drugs.