True Affections
You were,you are,and always will be,the one person I love more than anything.Our memories are all I have left of what we used to be.Even with my conflicting nature and resentment towards others,I don't begrudge you anything,especially not your happiness.I said it time and time again,"You deserve to be happy,you deserve whatever good comes your way."I've forgiven you for anything and everything you could've done to me,being that most things were small in nature.Not a single thing you could ever do would make me hate you.That's what makes you different from everyone else.You can do no wrong in my eyes.You are the one person I don't talk to anymore that I ache to see but am grateful I don't.I despair because you never call but I know we have different lives now so there isn't alot to say to each other.We can't relate like we used to for the simple reason that your responsibilites are so much greater than mine.Life led us in different directions but I'm eternally grateful for the amount of time I got to spend with you.You won't ever hear me utter the words,"I wish I'd never met you."That would be the biggest lie I'd ever tell.I can't fathom never having had you in my life and what it would be like if we'd never met.You're not a part of my life now but when you were,it was the happiest I'd ever been...ever.I deal with the frequent nostalgia for what was and will not be again,for how we were but aren't anymore.I'd do it all over again in a heartbeat.I wish things had been different because we'd be as big a part of each others lives as we were back then.Not a day has passed that I haven't thought of you and as painful as that sounds,I wouldn't want it any other way.And all the letters you wrote,I kept them all.Regardless of what anyone says or has said,you were the one constant person in my life during the darkest moments and were the only one who stuck by me.I'll never forget that and I won't let anyone forget it either.