All Art Is Quite Useless (Damon/Elena)

[upupa_epops]

Title: All Art Is Quite Useless
Fandom: The Vampire Diaries
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: THIS IS PRETENTIOUS. No, I mean it. I abuse Oscar Wilde in a terrible fashion.
Wordcount: 1000
Characters/Pairings: Damon/Elena
Spoilers: 3x22
Summary: Future!fic. He finds her in Europe, in a small town he's never heard of before, and doesn't care to hear about

Comments

[fluffyfrolicker]

I STILL LOVE THIS OKAY.

[upupa_epops]

You just love tacky stuff like that XD.

[fluffyfrolicker]

♥

[petitebelette]

Marta. Marta, how. Marta. Okay let me just.

“And if you're reading that Jane Eyre crap again, you might as well make yourself useful and get me one.”
It's my head canon that Damon reads Jane Eyre every few years or so because, "Jane's a highly spirited gal. Plenty to like there." Also, this is relevant to Elena bossing him around, okay. It just is. She's highly spirited.

I'm in love with how easily and non-apologetically she banters with Damon about compelling humans to cook, and it's never the same.

HOW. HOW. HOW DID YOU KNOW I LOVE THE IDEA OF READING THROUGH ORGASMS. HOW. HOW DID YOU DO THAT. Stoya actually made this video of reading a book out loud while someone under the table was using a vibrator on her, and it's like my favorite thing ever. JFC.

"ALL ART IS QUITE USELESS." You win everything.

[upupa_epops]

Fun fact? Jane Eyre is there because I was just re-reading it at the time XD. Elena most definitely is highly spirited.

HOW. HOW. HOW DID YOU KNOW I LOVE THE IDEA OF READING THROUGH ORGASMS. HOW. HOW DID YOU DO THAT.

PRETENTIOUS ENGLISH MAJOR STUFF, YO! I just really LOVE the idea of people reading out loud. I love being read to. Good books have melody to them, and the preface to The Picture of Dorian Gray was just made to be read out loud. It was so easy to wrap a story around reading it, because the natural pauses are THERE. *nerdgasm*

Personally, I think Damon would be most suited to read Virginia Woolf, but you can't blow someone who's reading Virginia Woolf to you. You just can't.

[petitebelette]

:D I have three copies of Jane Eyre. I reread it all the time.

ME TOO. I love reading aloud and being read to. But I have never read any Virginia Woolf. I know, it's a travesty.

[upupa_epops]

I'm writing a paper on Jane Eyre this term :). Hence the re-reading.

I've read very little, but I loved every word of what I've read.

[magisterequitum]

CRYING AT THIS

BLOWJOBS WHILE HE READS TO HER

[upupa_epops]

I am pretentious like that, yes.

[lynnenne]

I love the sensuality of this, the scent of apples mixed in with touch and sensation. Nicely done.

And this:

“And if you're reading that Jane Eyre crap again, you might as well make yourself useful and get me one.”

PERFECT.

[upupa_epops]

Thank you!

I am a sucker for apples ;).