i try and make it obvious when i am upset, or need someone to just tell me to calm down and quit being a downer. but maybe it is so obvious that no one even cares enough to care. i always feel like im taking two steps forward and one step back. i'm trying, i swear i am. its really the weather that keeps dampening my mood, i cant handle having hands i can't even feel. i can't handle it. the more i think about spring the more i can't wait to be jovial again. furthermore, things of my grandpa, or things that remind me of my grandpa keep popping up, thus dampering my mood even more.
i miss him so much, it hurts so bad sometimes. it really does.