'Twas the day before Christmas
'Twas the day before Christmas
An original composition by your's truly.
With sincere apologies to Clement Clarke Moore
'Twas the day before Christmas and all through the house,
All were broke, even the mouse.
Our credit is totaled to the max with care,
In hopes that bonus checks soon will be there.
The children were spying under the beds,
As visions of video games danced in their heads.
And mama in her rage, knocked off my old cap
As we settled in for the post shopping scrap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from her grip to see what was the matter.
Away from the window, I cowered from a flash,
The holiday lights set fire to the sash.
The flames lit the breast of the new fallen snow,
Gave luster to the inflated snowman below.
And what to my wondering eyes should appear,
A firetruck, eight firemen, and all of their gear.
The little old nozzle man, so lively and quick
I knew in a minute, the ice was too slick.
He slipped on the ice and shouted and swore,
From his grasp the fire hose tore.
The water streamed to porch and then to the wall,
Through the window and down the hall.
Water driven like the wild hurricane flies,
The stream took my wife between the eyes.
And then in a twinkling I heard on the porch,
The sounds of firemen extinguishing the torch.
As I reached for my wife and was turning around,
The neighborhood president stepped in with a bound.
His eyes, how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
is cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
A bundle of papers he flung on the rack,
Rules and regulations about displays on the back.
He'd counted the lights, he counted them all,
He even counted the lights on the wall.
With a wink of his eye and nod of his head,
I soon found that I had something to dread.
He spoke not a word, but showed me the rule,
My Christmas display was not neighborhood cool.
He gave me an order to take it all down,
Then he left me with with a nod and a frown.
I looked at my wife, soaked to the ear,
And said, "Thank God this comes but once a year."
With sincere apologies to Clement Clarke Moore
Christmas is the time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell government what they want and their kids pay for it.
- Richard Lamm
An original composition by your's truly.
With sincere apologies to Clement Clarke Moore
'Twas the day before Christmas and all through the house,
All were broke, even the mouse.
Our credit is totaled to the max with care,
In hopes that bonus checks soon will be there.
The children were spying under the beds,
As visions of video games danced in their heads.
And mama in her rage, knocked off my old cap
As we settled in for the post shopping scrap.
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from her grip to see what was the matter.
Away from the window, I cowered from a flash,
The holiday lights set fire to the sash.
The flames lit the breast of the new fallen snow,
Gave luster to the inflated snowman below.
And what to my wondering eyes should appear,
A firetruck, eight firemen, and all of their gear.
The little old nozzle man, so lively and quick
I knew in a minute, the ice was too slick.
He slipped on the ice and shouted and swore,
From his grasp the fire hose tore.
The water streamed to porch and then to the wall,
Through the window and down the hall.
Water driven like the wild hurricane flies,
The stream took my wife between the eyes.
And then in a twinkling I heard on the porch,
The sounds of firemen extinguishing the torch.
As I reached for my wife and was turning around,
The neighborhood president stepped in with a bound.
His eyes, how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
is cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
A bundle of papers he flung on the rack,
Rules and regulations about displays on the back.
He'd counted the lights, he counted them all,
He even counted the lights on the wall.
With a wink of his eye and nod of his head,
I soon found that I had something to dread.
He spoke not a word, but showed me the rule,
My Christmas display was not neighborhood cool.
He gave me an order to take it all down,
Then he left me with with a nod and a frown.
I looked at my wife, soaked to the ear,
And said, "Thank God this comes but once a year."
With sincere apologies to Clement Clarke Moore
Christmas is the time when kids tell Santa what they want and adults pay for it. Deficits are when adults tell government what they want and their kids pay for it.
- Richard Lamm