Breaking up is hard to do.
Jeff and I were having a problem. Well really it was me having a problem and Jeff just having to deal with me. Im not going to go into details because well I don't want to. Im done talking about it really. Affection was all it had to do with.
I didn't really know what to do about the problem I was having or really what the actual problem was so I went around asking the people that I depend on for advice.
When I asked my mom she said "You come from a Mexican family he comes from a White family" and " You guys just need to work it out." Which I understand, since I come from a Mexcian style family, I was raised to be very affectionate and just say what Im feeling. He was not. So I agree that we have to work on it but that doesn't really help with the how.
So I went to my Step mom, Samantha and I asked her. Her answer that we are just different people. The catch is though that we are such DIFFERENT people that it will never make us both happy and eventually our relationship will become a farce and neither of us will be happy and it will end up in divorce and a broken home ( My worst nightmare realized). She scared me so much that I thought that omg this is true and that I need to break up with Jeff because this isn't going to work. I don't want to waste my time just to get hurt in the end (if I can prevent it).
On a side note which will make more sense in a minute, I had dropped my phone in a glass of soda and it decided that it was going to die and not come back to life for a while. So I didn't have my phone for a day and I had no way of talking to Jeff for that period of time (I was 2 hours away from hijm, I didn't have an internet connection and my don't know his phone number since I have a phone that remembers it for me). My phone has decided to forgive me and we are now working on our relationship LOL
Anyways so I cried because I realized that my relationship with Jeff was becoming what I never wanted it to become and that now I was going to have to end it with someone that is my best friend and is my love and rock. I was completely depressed the whole day. Couldn't say anything with out breaking into tears and over all, just a whole mess. What topped it off was that I couldn't talk to Jeff at all during this period to sorta do that "say it isn't so" kind of thing.
My dad came home from work later. Earlier that day I had asked him for advice on my problem but because of time he wasn't able to give me any advice. So we took a drive and he told me that Jeff and I are an amazing couple and that we have everything that a couple needs to be great. He also told me that relationships are all about compromise and bending your will so that it can coextensive with an others. He basically told me what I was already thinking eariler before i talked to Samantha but put it more in focus.
A relationship is a work in progress and its never all perfume and roses all the time. There will always have to be compromises and just because you do those compromises doesn't mean that you are living a farce. He also told me that Jeff and I are at the stage where there needs to be a higher commitment but we aren't in a position to make it. Which is completely true. And although Jeff and I talk about marriage and our kids thats a long way off.
So I decided to go with my dads advice and when I told Samantha what my dad had said she agreed that he was right but that if the compromise becomes too one-sided then the relationship does become a farce and that then its time to leave before it becomes horrible.
So basically I went through a break up (even though it didn't actually happen) and it was hell and it just confirms to me that Jeff is the one.
Other news Ive been working out for a week and a half now but I feel so bloated and fat that I don't feel like I have improved in any way D:
I didn't really know what to do about the problem I was having or really what the actual problem was so I went around asking the people that I depend on for advice.
When I asked my mom she said "You come from a Mexican family he comes from a White family" and " You guys just need to work it out." Which I understand, since I come from a Mexcian style family, I was raised to be very affectionate and just say what Im feeling. He was not. So I agree that we have to work on it but that doesn't really help with the how.
So I went to my Step mom, Samantha and I asked her. Her answer that we are just different people. The catch is though that we are such DIFFERENT people that it will never make us both happy and eventually our relationship will become a farce and neither of us will be happy and it will end up in divorce and a broken home ( My worst nightmare realized). She scared me so much that I thought that omg this is true and that I need to break up with Jeff because this isn't going to work. I don't want to waste my time just to get hurt in the end (if I can prevent it).
On a side note which will make more sense in a minute, I had dropped my phone in a glass of soda and it decided that it was going to die and not come back to life for a while. So I didn't have my phone for a day and I had no way of talking to Jeff for that period of time (I was 2 hours away from hijm, I didn't have an internet connection and my don't know his phone number since I have a phone that remembers it for me). My phone has decided to forgive me and we are now working on our relationship LOL
Anyways so I cried because I realized that my relationship with Jeff was becoming what I never wanted it to become and that now I was going to have to end it with someone that is my best friend and is my love and rock. I was completely depressed the whole day. Couldn't say anything with out breaking into tears and over all, just a whole mess. What topped it off was that I couldn't talk to Jeff at all during this period to sorta do that "say it isn't so" kind of thing.
My dad came home from work later. Earlier that day I had asked him for advice on my problem but because of time he wasn't able to give me any advice. So we took a drive and he told me that Jeff and I are an amazing couple and that we have everything that a couple needs to be great. He also told me that relationships are all about compromise and bending your will so that it can coextensive with an others. He basically told me what I was already thinking eariler before i talked to Samantha but put it more in focus.
A relationship is a work in progress and its never all perfume and roses all the time. There will always have to be compromises and just because you do those compromises doesn't mean that you are living a farce. He also told me that Jeff and I are at the stage where there needs to be a higher commitment but we aren't in a position to make it. Which is completely true. And although Jeff and I talk about marriage and our kids thats a long way off.
So I decided to go with my dads advice and when I told Samantha what my dad had said she agreed that he was right but that if the compromise becomes too one-sided then the relationship does become a farce and that then its time to leave before it becomes horrible.
So basically I went through a break up (even though it didn't actually happen) and it was hell and it just confirms to me that Jeff is the one.
Other news Ive been working out for a week and a half now but I feel so bloated and fat that I don't feel like I have improved in any way D: