Durge in the Seventh
Less than two weeks... I don't know what to do. The science teacher is terrible and...I think I don't like her at all. She got really mad at me because we're supposed to do dissection later on this semmester. she got mad at me becase I waited to talk to her after class...I don't want to do it. I don't think it's right...to cut up some poor helpless animal that never did anything to anyone, just to see what's inside. It...it makes me want to go and free all the lab animals before everyone gets their hands on them. but if I do..I'll get into trouble. If I don't...they'll suffer a lot. And I just don't know what I should do about it....
And I know it's silly...I know that. I know I kill things. I kill bad vampires. I kill them...in horrible ways. The Kit is not a merciful thing... It's messy. It's painful. It's...punishment for all the bad things they did and could do again if they aren't stopped. It's for those who can't be saved. for those who've fallen to Level E...for those others who just hurt people and keep hurting them because they can...it's for them...
I know my hands aren't lilly white and I shouldn't get mad at sensei for what is to come. I know its hypocritical that I can't stand the thought of cutting a frog open when I hammer oak railroad spikes into a vampire's heart...while they are awake and alive. But... I think about the poor rabbits and frogs and other animals cowering in their cages waiting to be...slaughtered so we can learn and it makes my heart sick.
I can't even practice violin right now because of it...Because if I do...all I play are either sad or angry songs...and I don't want to play those because then I'll end up playing those for Fuji-sensei...and I know she's looking forward to Coppellia...and I just don't know what to do... I think I need a bath...I think best in a bath...
And I know it's silly...I know that. I know I kill things. I kill bad vampires. I kill them...in horrible ways. The Kit is not a merciful thing... It's messy. It's painful. It's...punishment for all the bad things they did and could do again if they aren't stopped. It's for those who can't be saved. for those who've fallen to Level E...for those others who just hurt people and keep hurting them because they can...it's for them...
I know my hands aren't lilly white and I shouldn't get mad at sensei for what is to come. I know its hypocritical that I can't stand the thought of cutting a frog open when I hammer oak railroad spikes into a vampire's heart...while they are awake and alive. But... I think about the poor rabbits and frogs and other animals cowering in their cages waiting to be...slaughtered so we can learn and it makes my heart sick.
I can't even practice violin right now because of it...Because if I do...all I play are either sad or angry songs...and I don't want to play those because then I'll end up playing those for Fuji-sensei...and I know she's looking forward to Coppellia...and I just don't know what to do... I think I need a bath...I think best in a bath...