(no subject)
I've got a giant swollen bruise on my hand because bitches can't give IVs. And the tech was like "it's normal for your nose to bleed while putting the tube down" but there was like blood all over her gloves and the tube and my face. And I had to take SEVENTEEN (17) pills the night before the test so I wouldn't die from the CT contrast, but when I got there the doctor decided my allergic reactions were too risky and didn't do the scan with the contrast so I took seventeen bitter pills for nothing. And there were other terrible things but I feel like I am on a level where I can't even relate to people anymore about this. The nurse who gave me the IV asked me if I'd ever had one, and I just smiled benignly and said yeah. I've had over 80 needle sticks this past year, at least 20 of which were IVs. Then the nurse who gave me the pain medication asked if I could taste the IV flush, because people had told her they could (it's more like a smell), and I was like wtf you're in your thirties and you've never had an IV? And most of the people giving these tests have never had them or their terrible preps. Urgh. We're still waiting for the results. This is supposedly the best scan they can do, so I'm worried they won't find anything and I'll have to go to Shands or somewhere. At least most of the people (EXCEPT THE CRAZY WHORE IV STARTER NURSE WHO DIDN'T LISTEN WHEN I SAID PLEASE PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STICK ME AGAIN INSTEAD OF DIGGING AROUND IN MY HAND WITH THAT NEEDLE, EVERYBODY DOES THAT, IT HURTS, JUST TRY AGAIN FROM THE TOP) were nice at TMH. The tech who took me through the procedure told me I look like I'm 15 and so did the medicine giver lady (she was like "1982?!" when she read my chart). I know I don't look that young. :( And the tech let me watch on the x-ray machine as the tube went down my throat into my stomach and small intestine and the barium started pumping in. Which is like, oh yay, but at least it was something to do while a tube lubricated primarily with my own nose blood is being shoved down my digestive track. The test took four damn hours and I was so cold and tired and I had to fast for 24 hours before it and afterward I wasn't even hungry so I didn't eat for like 40 hours. If I had $100 for every day I've had to fast this past year, I'd have $1,000. Anyway I'm down to 117 pounds and my nose and throat is killing me from that damn tube and my hand is swollen and hurts and my stomach still hurts which stuns me every time because the tube tricked me into thinking I just had surgery again and should be better, and I am generally miserable and depressed and wallowing in self pity even though lots of people have it worse.