When You Go {{Standalone}}
Title: When You Go {{Standalone}}
Summary: Frank loves Mikey. Frank loves Gerard. Mikey can't handle it.
Author: mamoo13
Pairing: Frank/ Mikey, implied Frank/ Gerard
Rating: PG13
Disclaimer: Fake.
Author's Notes: Written with a random need to write. No prompting, no plotline, just writing what came to mind...
Warnings: Uh, swear words??
Staring straight ahead without a thought in my mind, I walked away. Forever from his life. Nothing could pull me back, nothing could make me stay. His voice had been soft, his touch even more so. But his words had hurt, and they stabbed straight through me.
I couldn’t see through the sheet of tears covering my eyes, but before long I was standing in my living room at home. I knew the cat was rubbing up against my legs, but I felt nothing, heard nothing, saw nothing. Nothing but his face. His warm smile that held words like daggers.
It’s not you, he said. It’s me. It’s everything I should have said but didn’t. Everything you should have known but I never told you. I love you, but I love him too. I love you both
I love you both.
His words rang though my ears over and over. An echo. A distant echo that deafened me.
I sank to the floor, still not feeling anything as my body hit the hardwood. The cat began to paw at my face, but I ignored her.
I love you both.
How could he love two people? How could he love my brother? My brother and me. My mind couldn’t begin to process it.
A tear fell down my cheek and onto the oak below me.
The cat lay down next to me.
I love you both.
I wanted to scream. I wanted to beat the shit out of him. I wanted to do something. Anything. Anything but lay here and hear his words over and over.
It was like having the chorus of a song you hate stuck in your head. You don’t want it there, but it’s so stuck that you have no choice but to repeat it to yourself over and over until you have a pounding headache.
If there’s anything I can do, Mikey, I will. I’ll ignore him forever, if that’s possible. I just can’t let you go. Even if I love him. I love you more.
I’d thrown a book at him after he’d said that. He couldn’t love me and my brother at the same time. No way in hell. None.
Fuck you, Frank, I’d said. If you knew he’d take you, you’d leave me in an instant. Don’t give me that shit.
He’d bowed his head silently, looking at the rug beneath his feet. I love you both, he whispered again. I walked out.
I choked and began to sob, still laying on the floor with the cat next to me. He’d left Jamia for me. I’d left Alicia for him. Why couldn’t he leave Gerard, too?
I cried myself to sleep on that floor, still hearing I love you both, over and over in my head.
Hours later, I felt my body being lifted from the floor. I was gently lead to the couch, where I lay down again, and was covered by a blanket. I grumbled in appreciation, waking up slowly.
Hot tears rushed back in an instant. Standing above me was Frank, pulling the blanket up to my chin, and brushing hair from my face.
I sat up quickly, making him step back in surprise. “Get out,” I commanded quietly, tears wetting my voice.
“Mikey, I-”
“Get out.”
“Mikey-”
“No, Frank, I can’t look at you. I want you out.”
“But Mikey, I love you.”
“What about Gerard?”
“I know now that I can only have one of you.”
“Bullshit.”
He moved forward to sit on the couch next to me, and brushed hair from my tear-stained cheeks. “I love you, Mikey. Not him. I’m an idiot, an asshole, for ever thinking that I did. I don’t love both of you, I love only you.”
I love only you.
I love only you.
I began to cry again, but let him pull me into his embrace.
“I love you too, Frank.”
Summary: Frank loves Mikey. Frank loves Gerard. Mikey can't handle it.
Author: mamoo13
Pairing: Frank/ Mikey, implied Frank/ Gerard
Rating: PG13
Disclaimer: Fake.
Author's Notes: Written with a random need to write. No prompting, no plotline, just writing what came to mind...
Warnings: Uh, swear words??
Staring straight ahead without a thought in my mind, I walked away. Forever from his life. Nothing could pull me back, nothing could make me stay. His voice had been soft, his touch even more so. But his words had hurt, and they stabbed straight through me.
I couldn’t see through the sheet of tears covering my eyes, but before long I was standing in my living room at home. I knew the cat was rubbing up against my legs, but I felt nothing, heard nothing, saw nothing. Nothing but his face. His warm smile that held words like daggers.
It’s not you, he said. It’s me. It’s everything I should have said but didn’t. Everything you should have known but I never told you. I love you, but I love him too. I love you both
I love you both.
His words rang though my ears over and over. An echo. A distant echo that deafened me.
I sank to the floor, still not feeling anything as my body hit the hardwood. The cat began to paw at my face, but I ignored her.
I love you both.
How could he love two people? How could he love my brother? My brother and me. My mind couldn’t begin to process it.
A tear fell down my cheek and onto the oak below me.
The cat lay down next to me.
I love you both.
I wanted to scream. I wanted to beat the shit out of him. I wanted to do something. Anything. Anything but lay here and hear his words over and over.
It was like having the chorus of a song you hate stuck in your head. You don’t want it there, but it’s so stuck that you have no choice but to repeat it to yourself over and over until you have a pounding headache.
If there’s anything I can do, Mikey, I will. I’ll ignore him forever, if that’s possible. I just can’t let you go. Even if I love him. I love you more.
I’d thrown a book at him after he’d said that. He couldn’t love me and my brother at the same time. No way in hell. None.
Fuck you, Frank, I’d said. If you knew he’d take you, you’d leave me in an instant. Don’t give me that shit.
He’d bowed his head silently, looking at the rug beneath his feet. I love you both, he whispered again. I walked out.
I choked and began to sob, still laying on the floor with the cat next to me. He’d left Jamia for me. I’d left Alicia for him. Why couldn’t he leave Gerard, too?
I cried myself to sleep on that floor, still hearing I love you both, over and over in my head.
Hours later, I felt my body being lifted from the floor. I was gently lead to the couch, where I lay down again, and was covered by a blanket. I grumbled in appreciation, waking up slowly.
Hot tears rushed back in an instant. Standing above me was Frank, pulling the blanket up to my chin, and brushing hair from my face.
I sat up quickly, making him step back in surprise. “Get out,” I commanded quietly, tears wetting my voice.
“Mikey, I-”
“Get out.”
“Mikey-”
“No, Frank, I can’t look at you. I want you out.”
“But Mikey, I love you.”
“What about Gerard?”
“I know now that I can only have one of you.”
“Bullshit.”
He moved forward to sit on the couch next to me, and brushed hair from my tear-stained cheeks. “I love you, Mikey. Not him. I’m an idiot, an asshole, for ever thinking that I did. I don’t love both of you, I love only you.”
I love only you.
I love only you.
I began to cry again, but let him pull me into his embrace.
“I love you too, Frank.”