Oh mother.
So, this is about as serious of a post as you'll ever get from me, but I needed to vent... mostly to myself.
I love my mom an awful lot. Growing up, we had more of a friendship than a parent/son relationship. That being said, she really pisses me off in a lot of ways.
I won't even get too far in to the personality disorders she brought upon me as a child. What with her always running from problems, jumping from one safety net to another... it really turned me in to quite the gypsy myself during my late teens and early twenties. We moved so much when I was growing up and it really made me become unsettled if I stayed in one place for any length of time.
I don't know if she'd blame it on her being a free spirit... or if she just gets restless and bored with places and people. It's frustrating thinking back on it, but I guess kids can't do anything about how they were brought up. I still enjoyed my childhood, but I'm sure it turned me in to the person I am.
That being said, ever since living on my own, away from family... I have slowly gotten away from her habits and I am now comfortable staying in one place, living with the same person/people, and having a settled life. A small change every now and then is good, but I don't feel the need to make anything drastic happen anymore.
On the EXTREME opposite end, she will be 52 this year. She still lives the same lifestyle, jumping from person to person, getting what she needs out of them and then, I guess, getting bored and finding creative ways to move on. It's a trend I used to chalk up to her choosing the wrong people and eventually wising up to her bad decisions and leaving them but now I am not so sure.
She may be in her 50's, but she can pull off early 30's without a problem. It's probably how she's still able to get away with the lifestyle she leads.
And that leads me in to why I'm posting this rant today. A short time ago, she called me and told me she had been in a car accident. I was worried and did the typical "Are you ok? What happened?" questionnaire. She explained that it was foggy and she basically drove off the side of a mountain because she couldn't see the road. As she continued, her story got worse and worse. As I expected, alcohol became involved. You see, ever since moving to California, my mom has fallen in love with wine. I hate to say she's now a drunk, but hey, a spade is most definitely a spade to a poker player.
She eventually told me that at the hospital, she was charged with a DUI but not taken to jail since she was slightly injured. She said she only had one glass of wine, but I'm willing to bet that just isn't the case.
I'm venting because it's easier to do it on here than to confront her and explain to her how upset I am that me... a 25 year old who has no real job ('real' being defined as something involving a paycheck) and supports himself in ways he can only consider to be having fun with friends (poker and DJing)... is monumentally more mature than her.
I am a fucking slacker. I love being a slacker. I love the fact that I can get away with playing cards and spinning CDs to make a living and have so much free time that I seriously don't know what to do with myself. My life rocks and I know it does. But, I also know the truth is that I wouldn't even have this life if it weren't for my insane amounts of laziness I possess. And even knowing that about myself, I still know that I am more grown up than my own mother.
Well, that's enough venting for now, without going in to the reasons behind my venting... which just aren't important at the moment.
I love my mom an awful lot. Growing up, we had more of a friendship than a parent/son relationship. That being said, she really pisses me off in a lot of ways.
I won't even get too far in to the personality disorders she brought upon me as a child. What with her always running from problems, jumping from one safety net to another... it really turned me in to quite the gypsy myself during my late teens and early twenties. We moved so much when I was growing up and it really made me become unsettled if I stayed in one place for any length of time.
I don't know if she'd blame it on her being a free spirit... or if she just gets restless and bored with places and people. It's frustrating thinking back on it, but I guess kids can't do anything about how they were brought up. I still enjoyed my childhood, but I'm sure it turned me in to the person I am.
That being said, ever since living on my own, away from family... I have slowly gotten away from her habits and I am now comfortable staying in one place, living with the same person/people, and having a settled life. A small change every now and then is good, but I don't feel the need to make anything drastic happen anymore.
On the EXTREME opposite end, she will be 52 this year. She still lives the same lifestyle, jumping from person to person, getting what she needs out of them and then, I guess, getting bored and finding creative ways to move on. It's a trend I used to chalk up to her choosing the wrong people and eventually wising up to her bad decisions and leaving them but now I am not so sure.
She may be in her 50's, but she can pull off early 30's without a problem. It's probably how she's still able to get away with the lifestyle she leads.
And that leads me in to why I'm posting this rant today. A short time ago, she called me and told me she had been in a car accident. I was worried and did the typical "Are you ok? What happened?" questionnaire. She explained that it was foggy and she basically drove off the side of a mountain because she couldn't see the road. As she continued, her story got worse and worse. As I expected, alcohol became involved. You see, ever since moving to California, my mom has fallen in love with wine. I hate to say she's now a drunk, but hey, a spade is most definitely a spade to a poker player.
She eventually told me that at the hospital, she was charged with a DUI but not taken to jail since she was slightly injured. She said she only had one glass of wine, but I'm willing to bet that just isn't the case.
I'm venting because it's easier to do it on here than to confront her and explain to her how upset I am that me... a 25 year old who has no real job ('real' being defined as something involving a paycheck) and supports himself in ways he can only consider to be having fun with friends (poker and DJing)... is monumentally more mature than her.
I am a fucking slacker. I love being a slacker. I love the fact that I can get away with playing cards and spinning CDs to make a living and have so much free time that I seriously don't know what to do with myself. My life rocks and I know it does. But, I also know the truth is that I wouldn't even have this life if it weren't for my insane amounts of laziness I possess. And even knowing that about myself, I still know that I am more grown up than my own mother.
Well, that's enough venting for now, without going in to the reasons behind my venting... which just aren't important at the moment.