Space Invaders: Good Omens, Johnny Maxwell
There were knees in his tree.
This was odd on two levels, really.
First off, he'd never really known it was his tree, at least not consciously. It just was. Yo-less and Kirsty were above such things, Wobbler was... generally below it, and Bigmac's boots tended to get in the way. So it was his tree, and it was where he liked to think, when he thought, which he did too much according to his mum.
His mum was in a bit of a weird mood, lately. Since his dad had found a new place to live she'd been trying to get Johnny to come home more, but he was pretty happy living with his granddad, when it came down to it. His granddad never got overenthusiastic about games of snap, and certainly never cried, after. He was more than willing to put up with warm baked beans every night if it meant his homework wasn't interrupted by shouting, or crying, or that time when she'd set fire to a pile of his dad's clothes and they'd had to get the fire-engines out. But she was his mum, that was what it came down to, so he went home a few nights a week and accepted the bad marks for his homework with good grace.
The other reason it was odd was because they were unfamiliar knees. Entirely too grubby to be anyone he knew. He hadn't known there was that much mud in Blackbury, actually.
Above the knees there were a pair of long shorts which... had probably been denim, once, a T-shirt which was probably supposed to be white, and a wide grin on a friendly face.
"Morning," said the face.
Johnny answered, non-committally, that it probably was.
"You're Johnny? Because Adam said I'd prob'ly find you here and I'm supposed to bring you back to there."
The face, along with the rest of the boy, jumped down from the tree, managing to land in about the only spot of mud left from the rain, the night before. He was a little shorter than Johnny, and stockier, and dirty. It wasn't unpleasant, or offensive in any way; there was just something kind of ground-in about him. Johnny considered the grubby hand that had been offered for a moment or two before shaking it.
"I'm Brian."
"Er. Johnny."
"I know, Adam said. I said Adam said. Didn't I say? He said I was supposed to look for you in the tree in the graveyard, and you only have one tree. 'slike Tadfield, only we have loads of trees and only one lamp-post. Don't suppose lamp-posts get lonely, though."
"So trees get lonely?"
"Dunno. Maybe. Not in Tadfield they don't - we've got loads, I said. And we've got cows, too, but they don't really use the lamp-post."
"Maybe cows can see in the dark," said Johnny, more than a little bemused, now. They were wandering in the direction of Blackbury town centre, now, Brian occasionally kicking at clods of dirt and puffing dust all over himself.
"Could do. They might eat carrots."
"My mum's always going on about rabbits getting in the carrots," he added, helpfully, dancing out of the way of a fountain of dirt that the other boy'd managed to create. "Maybe she only thinks it's rabbits, and it's really cows. I always thought cows looked a bit sneaky, like they know more'n they're saying."
"I'm gonna tell my mum that," Brian said, thoughtfully. "She always blames the holes in the hedges on me 'n' Wensley 'n' Adam 'n' Pepper, but it's not our fault if it's cows. Stands to reason it's not our fault if we only use the holes after the cows've made them."
-
Brian led the way to the new arcade. It was full of flashy lights and beepy noises and the sound of coins clinking. The sounds of coins clinking into the machines was always a lot louder than the sound of the coins clinking out of the machines. In fact, that was a pretty reliable way of looking for Wobbler - follow the disgruntled looking employees and the sound of coins clinking into the tray. Wobbler had a fake ID that let him play on the games for the adults, and a note from his doctor that said he had some kind of lack-of-growing thing, and not to mention it to him because he was really sensitive. It was weird, how often it worked. That was kind of the advantage of Yo-less; he knew a lot of big words.
He wasn't in the fruit machine section today, though. Brian weaved his way through to where they had all the MegaBlast VI machines, the ones that'd only come in a couple of days before. They were supposed to be the top new machines, with Realistic Loading Action and Genuine Laser Technology. Johnny thought they seemed pretty much like the MegaBlast V machines, only with the addition of a flashing light going round and round on top, but they hadn't been able to crowbar Wobbler away from them.
There was a small circle of people around the machines. There was Yo-less, who was standing next to a boy with sandy-blond hair and glasses - both of them seemed to be trying very hard not to look impressed with the machines. And then there was Bigmac, who was standing really close to a girl with bright red hair and loads of freckles who looked like Johnny's mum did when she'd found out something he'd really hoped she wouldn't find out. And right in front of the machines was Wobbler, firing furiously and sweating a bit, and another boy with tousled blond hair who was cradling the gun in the crook of his arm and just watching the screen intently. There was something kind of odd about him, but Johnny couldn't work out what it was.
Yo-less finally caught sight of the new arrivals and ambled over, pushing his glasses up his nose.
"Alright Johnny?"
"Alright, Yo-less. This is Brian." The two boys regarded each other.
"My name's not really Yo-less," Yo-less said.
"Hunh," said Brian, consideringly. "My name's really Brian," he added, after a moment's thought. That seemed to pretty much exhaust their conversation, and Yo-less turned back to Johnny.
"Simon's got a girlfriend."
Johnny frowned. "Eh?" Yo-less jerked his head over to where Bigmac stood, and Johnny rolled his eyes.
"Look, Yo-less, I told you. He's only Simon when your mum's around, otherwise I get confused. Besides, it hurts his feelings. Simon's not a proper skins name, is it?" He scratched his nose and frowned. "How's he got a girlfriend, then?"
"'s that girl, Pepper."
"'snot her real name," Brian added helpfully.
"He grinned at her and she kicked him in the leg and he's been following her around ever since with a silly smile on his face."
Brian sniggered. "Last time she kicked me in the leg I couldn't've followed her around. I couldn't walk for a whole hour." The two other boys looked at Pepper with newfound respect.
There was a loud beeping from the machine, and Wobbler said a word that made Yo-less roll his eyes and Brian's grin widen.
"Adam's won again, then." He didn't really sound surprised, but turned and grinned at his friend. "I brung him like you said, Adam."
Johnny turned to smile at the new boy and. Stopped. There was really something weird about him. His eyes were a little too blue, and his hair was a little too blond, and he seemed... a little too real. Like the whole rest of the arcade was just scenery, and everyone else there were just actors, and everything had been waiting for this single moment, had been waiting for this boy to arrive. The flashing lights and bleeps and chatter of voices faded away, almost disappeared, and Adam grinned slowly. A sly grin. Like he had a secret that he was willing to share with Johnny, only Johnny wasn't really sure he wanted to. And then the boy's grin widened, and he looked like a normal eleven year old boy again, and Johnny was suddenly terrified.
"We're staying here for a week," Brian was telling Bigmac, although it didn't really look like Bigmac was paying much attention. "My mum did that thing where she thinks that everyone in your class is your best friend, even if they're stupid, and Greasy Johnson came out to visit his cousin Wobbler and I said no way I'm going without Adam 'n' Pepper 'n' Wensleydale 'cos it wasn't just me that was playing with that football, and I wasn't even the one that kicked it through the window, actually."
Adam raised his eyebrows at Johnny.
"Whole week with nothing to do. I reckon you 'n' me are gonna be friends."
Johnny didn't nod. But he felt his head move, just the same.
This was odd on two levels, really.
First off, he'd never really known it was his tree, at least not consciously. It just was. Yo-less and Kirsty were above such things, Wobbler was... generally below it, and Bigmac's boots tended to get in the way. So it was his tree, and it was where he liked to think, when he thought, which he did too much according to his mum.
His mum was in a bit of a weird mood, lately. Since his dad had found a new place to live she'd been trying to get Johnny to come home more, but he was pretty happy living with his granddad, when it came down to it. His granddad never got overenthusiastic about games of snap, and certainly never cried, after. He was more than willing to put up with warm baked beans every night if it meant his homework wasn't interrupted by shouting, or crying, or that time when she'd set fire to a pile of his dad's clothes and they'd had to get the fire-engines out. But she was his mum, that was what it came down to, so he went home a few nights a week and accepted the bad marks for his homework with good grace.
The other reason it was odd was because they were unfamiliar knees. Entirely too grubby to be anyone he knew. He hadn't known there was that much mud in Blackbury, actually.
Above the knees there were a pair of long shorts which... had probably been denim, once, a T-shirt which was probably supposed to be white, and a wide grin on a friendly face.
"Morning," said the face.
Johnny answered, non-committally, that it probably was.
"You're Johnny? Because Adam said I'd prob'ly find you here and I'm supposed to bring you back to there."
The face, along with the rest of the boy, jumped down from the tree, managing to land in about the only spot of mud left from the rain, the night before. He was a little shorter than Johnny, and stockier, and dirty. It wasn't unpleasant, or offensive in any way; there was just something kind of ground-in about him. Johnny considered the grubby hand that had been offered for a moment or two before shaking it.
"I'm Brian."
"Er. Johnny."
"I know, Adam said. I said Adam said. Didn't I say? He said I was supposed to look for you in the tree in the graveyard, and you only have one tree. 'slike Tadfield, only we have loads of trees and only one lamp-post. Don't suppose lamp-posts get lonely, though."
"So trees get lonely?"
"Dunno. Maybe. Not in Tadfield they don't - we've got loads, I said. And we've got cows, too, but they don't really use the lamp-post."
"Maybe cows can see in the dark," said Johnny, more than a little bemused, now. They were wandering in the direction of Blackbury town centre, now, Brian occasionally kicking at clods of dirt and puffing dust all over himself.
"Could do. They might eat carrots."
"My mum's always going on about rabbits getting in the carrots," he added, helpfully, dancing out of the way of a fountain of dirt that the other boy'd managed to create. "Maybe she only thinks it's rabbits, and it's really cows. I always thought cows looked a bit sneaky, like they know more'n they're saying."
"I'm gonna tell my mum that," Brian said, thoughtfully. "She always blames the holes in the hedges on me 'n' Wensley 'n' Adam 'n' Pepper, but it's not our fault if it's cows. Stands to reason it's not our fault if we only use the holes after the cows've made them."
-
Brian led the way to the new arcade. It was full of flashy lights and beepy noises and the sound of coins clinking. The sounds of coins clinking into the machines was always a lot louder than the sound of the coins clinking out of the machines. In fact, that was a pretty reliable way of looking for Wobbler - follow the disgruntled looking employees and the sound of coins clinking into the tray. Wobbler had a fake ID that let him play on the games for the adults, and a note from his doctor that said he had some kind of lack-of-growing thing, and not to mention it to him because he was really sensitive. It was weird, how often it worked. That was kind of the advantage of Yo-less; he knew a lot of big words.
He wasn't in the fruit machine section today, though. Brian weaved his way through to where they had all the MegaBlast VI machines, the ones that'd only come in a couple of days before. They were supposed to be the top new machines, with Realistic Loading Action and Genuine Laser Technology. Johnny thought they seemed pretty much like the MegaBlast V machines, only with the addition of a flashing light going round and round on top, but they hadn't been able to crowbar Wobbler away from them.
There was a small circle of people around the machines. There was Yo-less, who was standing next to a boy with sandy-blond hair and glasses - both of them seemed to be trying very hard not to look impressed with the machines. And then there was Bigmac, who was standing really close to a girl with bright red hair and loads of freckles who looked like Johnny's mum did when she'd found out something he'd really hoped she wouldn't find out. And right in front of the machines was Wobbler, firing furiously and sweating a bit, and another boy with tousled blond hair who was cradling the gun in the crook of his arm and just watching the screen intently. There was something kind of odd about him, but Johnny couldn't work out what it was.
Yo-less finally caught sight of the new arrivals and ambled over, pushing his glasses up his nose.
"Alright Johnny?"
"Alright, Yo-less. This is Brian." The two boys regarded each other.
"My name's not really Yo-less," Yo-less said.
"Hunh," said Brian, consideringly. "My name's really Brian," he added, after a moment's thought. That seemed to pretty much exhaust their conversation, and Yo-less turned back to Johnny.
"Simon's got a girlfriend."
Johnny frowned. "Eh?" Yo-less jerked his head over to where Bigmac stood, and Johnny rolled his eyes.
"Look, Yo-less, I told you. He's only Simon when your mum's around, otherwise I get confused. Besides, it hurts his feelings. Simon's not a proper skins name, is it?" He scratched his nose and frowned. "How's he got a girlfriend, then?"
"'s that girl, Pepper."
"'snot her real name," Brian added helpfully.
"He grinned at her and she kicked him in the leg and he's been following her around ever since with a silly smile on his face."
Brian sniggered. "Last time she kicked me in the leg I couldn't've followed her around. I couldn't walk for a whole hour." The two other boys looked at Pepper with newfound respect.
There was a loud beeping from the machine, and Wobbler said a word that made Yo-less roll his eyes and Brian's grin widen.
"Adam's won again, then." He didn't really sound surprised, but turned and grinned at his friend. "I brung him like you said, Adam."
Johnny turned to smile at the new boy and. Stopped. There was really something weird about him. His eyes were a little too blue, and his hair was a little too blond, and he seemed... a little too real. Like the whole rest of the arcade was just scenery, and everyone else there were just actors, and everything had been waiting for this single moment, had been waiting for this boy to arrive. The flashing lights and bleeps and chatter of voices faded away, almost disappeared, and Adam grinned slowly. A sly grin. Like he had a secret that he was willing to share with Johnny, only Johnny wasn't really sure he wanted to. And then the boy's grin widened, and he looked like a normal eleven year old boy again, and Johnny was suddenly terrified.
"We're staying here for a week," Brian was telling Bigmac, although it didn't really look like Bigmac was paying much attention. "My mum did that thing where she thinks that everyone in your class is your best friend, even if they're stupid, and Greasy Johnson came out to visit his cousin Wobbler and I said no way I'm going without Adam 'n' Pepper 'n' Wensleydale 'cos it wasn't just me that was playing with that football, and I wasn't even the one that kicked it through the window, actually."
Adam raised his eyebrows at Johnny.
"Whole week with nothing to do. I reckon you 'n' me are gonna be friends."
Johnny didn't nod. But he felt his head move, just the same.