giving yoursef one additude ajustment
I looked at my entries and I know no one reads them but it looked like I am upset all the time, but is that not when you use a journal???? Well, I have figured some things out like, in order to really love someone you must love yourself, and not in a way that is toxic as in you do anything to make them love you including going against your better judgment, doing things we know are not right just to please other and putting your self in harms way just for others enjoyment. I used to think that made a person selfish but it makes them smart and able to give in kinder ways. The adjustment period will be rough as even thou they say they love you a part of every human like the fact that they have power and control; over others and in this ase it is no different. have said often to my children that if people continue to be abusive and inconsiderate to me thier relationship with me will change promptly and very drasticlly. I am not saying none can make a mistake around me, but disrespect and blatant lying will just not go over well anymore. AS I don't think I deserve it and by allowing someone to do that to me is not teaching my children the cause and effect of the choices we make. So I will make my boundrys set them and stick to them. Knowing full well it will be very hard for quite awhile but nothing can be as bad as it has been for the last 3 years and quite frankly it may even prove to be a eye opener for not only me but the people that are a part of my life too. We will see...