LJI 10 wk 9: Trolley problem
"Well, all my friends are doing it!"
"If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you jump off too?"
Hands up who remembers that conversation from their youth? *raises hand* Usually code for "Stop being an idiot!" +/- an undertone of "I'm supposed to be the adult here! Why is it so hard to just get them to behave?"
How about the follow-up facebook meme,
"If all my friends jumped off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them. I'd be at the bottom and try to catch them;" is that familiar?
And whilst both worthy sentiments in their own way, who else has ever thought they were both still lacking? Or is that just me?
Today I encountered the reason why I think it is; picture the scene:
Jesus has been healing people, including giving sight to the blind, which was a clear indicator that He's the Messiah (The Holy One, the One Who Came From God), but He was about to get lynched for "blasphemy" for saying He's the Son of God, so He's been hiding out. Gets the news that His friend Lazarus is gravely ill, and then that he's dead (sorry, pun not intended). And Jesus wants to go back. The others remind Jesus about the mob who'd tried to stone him, but He's going anyway; in what is possibly one of the most loving acts in the whole bible, 'Then Thomas (also known as Didymus[which means Twin although I don't know why they didn't just say that]) said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.” ' [John Ch 11 v 16]
How beautiful is that? Real friendship, being so in it together, even to the point of death. Sometimes, more people dying is worth the cost, because living and dying with honour -- for example, to show a friend you've got their back -- are worth more than sheer number of days in one's life. "Let us... die with him."
That's the thing that's been missing. Jumping off a bridge when all your friends do isn't always such a bad idea afterall.
But who is really living that life? Who has people that close to them? Family grows up and moves away. I can't remember the last time I saw my sister without makeup on. Not that there's anything wrong with makeup, but it's such a tangible symbol of who is on the "inside" of her life, and who is in the wider circle. And adult friendships don't really have enough time together, and certainly not without appointment, these days, to really be 'in it together' with each other. My sister lives 10 minutes walk away from me now. And I've called on her precisely the same amount of times as I did when she lived an hour's drive away, or four hours' drive away, or on the opposite side of the world; which is to say, exactly zero. Because I assume she'll be busy. I know it's a two-way street. But I think everyone is going through this, these days.
The only exceptions I can think of, whether in books or in real life, is when people are in life-or-death situations together. Or at any rate, something with high stakes. Which is why people get married and form their own nuclear families, because those people do see each other every day, are (for the most part) on the inside of each other's lives.
Chance'd be a fine thing, for that, eh?
"If all your friends jumped off a bridge, would you jump off too?"
Hands up who remembers that conversation from their youth? *raises hand* Usually code for "Stop being an idiot!" +/- an undertone of "I'm supposed to be the adult here! Why is it so hard to just get them to behave?"
How about the follow-up facebook meme,
"If all my friends jumped off a bridge, I wouldn't jump with them. I'd be at the bottom and try to catch them;" is that familiar?
And whilst both worthy sentiments in their own way, who else has ever thought they were both still lacking? Or is that just me?
Today I encountered the reason why I think it is; picture the scene:
Jesus has been healing people, including giving sight to the blind, which was a clear indicator that He's the Messiah (The Holy One, the One Who Came From God), but He was about to get lynched for "blasphemy" for saying He's the Son of God, so He's been hiding out. Gets the news that His friend Lazarus is gravely ill, and then that he's dead (sorry, pun not intended). And Jesus wants to go back. The others remind Jesus about the mob who'd tried to stone him, but He's going anyway; in what is possibly one of the most loving acts in the whole bible, 'Then Thomas (also known as Didymus[which means Twin although I don't know why they didn't just say that]) said to the rest of the disciples, “Let us also go, that we may die with him.” ' [John Ch 11 v 16]
How beautiful is that? Real friendship, being so in it together, even to the point of death. Sometimes, more people dying is worth the cost, because living and dying with honour -- for example, to show a friend you've got their back -- are worth more than sheer number of days in one's life. "Let us... die with him."
That's the thing that's been missing. Jumping off a bridge when all your friends do isn't always such a bad idea afterall.
But who is really living that life? Who has people that close to them? Family grows up and moves away. I can't remember the last time I saw my sister without makeup on. Not that there's anything wrong with makeup, but it's such a tangible symbol of who is on the "inside" of her life, and who is in the wider circle. And adult friendships don't really have enough time together, and certainly not without appointment, these days, to really be 'in it together' with each other. My sister lives 10 minutes walk away from me now. And I've called on her precisely the same amount of times as I did when she lived an hour's drive away, or four hours' drive away, or on the opposite side of the world; which is to say, exactly zero. Because I assume she'll be busy. I know it's a two-way street. But I think everyone is going through this, these days.
The only exceptions I can think of, whether in books or in real life, is when people are in life-or-death situations together. Or at any rate, something with high stakes. Which is why people get married and form their own nuclear families, because those people do see each other every day, are (for the most part) on the inside of each other's lives.
Chance'd be a fine thing, for that, eh?