A Day in the Life
There's lots of fun and games working in an accountants. Lots of secrets you learn. Especially if you keep your head down and actually do some work whilst the boss is in the office, and then he won't clock you listening in.
I could tell you all about the most interesting cases we work on. I know which of our clients is a registered masseusse (and does her accounts accordingly) but, erm, shall we say, "offers more than massage"? (And why her folder is filed under 'F'.) I know who has their hands in the till and doesn't declare all of their income to us (they're actually very blatent about it). I know who wants to reduce their profits so that they don't have to pay their wife very much in their divorce settlement. I know who puts all their expenses through the wrong business (people who have more than one business and treat them too interchangably). I obviously know who makes a profit or a loss, and I know who takes their business from profit to loss by giving themselves higher wages than they can afford. I know what everyone gets upto, and I know what my colleagues say about you behin your back. *wink*
But you don't know what I get up to. How many times I fabricate -- ahem, "estimate" -- your expenses (although, if you don't give me enough receipts and/or enough time to peruse them thoroughly, what am I supposed to do?). How much time I spend 'filing' (that you'll be paying for). Seriously, I have spent a full day of my time, sometimes two, before now, going through all your invoices and highlighting the date on them. How many times a day I wish you'd end your damn love affair with the blinkin' stapler, and start using a folder or, better, a treasury tag, in its place! Or how many other people I have to drag over to be involved in your accounts because you did something that really, really oesn't make sense.
It's all fun and games in the accountants!
This has been a home game entry for LJ Idol Exhibit A, based on the prompt "Shenanigans".
I could tell you all about the most interesting cases we work on. I know which of our clients is a registered masseusse (and does her accounts accordingly) but, erm, shall we say, "offers more than massage"? (And why her folder is filed under 'F'.) I know who has their hands in the till and doesn't declare all of their income to us (they're actually very blatent about it). I know who wants to reduce their profits so that they don't have to pay their wife very much in their divorce settlement. I know who puts all their expenses through the wrong business (people who have more than one business and treat them too interchangably). I obviously know who makes a profit or a loss, and I know who takes their business from profit to loss by giving themselves higher wages than they can afford. I know what everyone gets upto, and I know what my colleagues say about you behin your back. *wink*
But you don't know what I get up to. How many times I fabricate -- ahem, "estimate" -- your expenses (although, if you don't give me enough receipts and/or enough time to peruse them thoroughly, what am I supposed to do?). How much time I spend 'filing' (that you'll be paying for). Seriously, I have spent a full day of my time, sometimes two, before now, going through all your invoices and highlighting the date on them. How many times a day I wish you'd end your damn love affair with the blinkin' stapler, and start using a folder or, better, a treasury tag, in its place! Or how many other people I have to drag over to be involved in your accounts because you did something that really, really oesn't make sense.
It's all fun and games in the accountants!
This has been a home game entry for LJ Idol Exhibit A, based on the prompt "Shenanigans".