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Gah. This week has been really cool in some wayssss, and just so... gah... bad in others. Everything was cool and such until Thursday. Then Friday, I got all drunk, and made an ass of myself saying, "all I want is love" What a gay ass askjdghkjhadsg grrrarrrr... So... I decided tonight, driving home, that Im healing, and not just from one thing, from things people wouldnt even think of for, or about me. So maybe I am crazy, and maybe I will cry ever time I get drunk from now until Christmas, but I need to, and more importantly, I need people to understand that. Im not some over dramatic teen, Im just... "hurt"....? Yeah... And its not from any one person, or the things they said. I just... need... time. Time to remember him, you, them. Time to think where I went wrong, time to realise why my life went this way. Time to... not get over, but heal from the wounds they all delt, and I eventually delt myself. I might be the most moodiest person, but atleast I get it. I just wish it made more sence. It really was wierd/amazing though on Thur. I haven't cried sober in years... hahhahahaklajshdgkjhasgakjghhahahahahahahalkajshg. Im just finally... Snapping or breaking down. Because this build up is taking over me, I mean seriously look at me. Someone fucking please! Look at me, see me, care about me, FUCKING LOVE ME FOR CHRIST SAKE! I just dont get what I did to all of them, haha. I blew off plans with Kim to go be a friend to Lauren, because she needed someone to talk to, and be there. But where is she? Where is anyone, the only time Im noticed is when Im sitting in a ball crying, it shouldn't get to that. Im not some angry bitter bitch, Im just upset. I wish I didnt have to explain this shit to people, and that they just got it.