(no subject)
For 2 and a half years I dated quite possibly the worlds worst person. He was hateful, rude, self-centered, violent, insecure, spiteful and most importantly out of his fucking mind. I can honestly say that the entire time I dated this person i was depressed, lonely, stressed and scared. Talk about constantly getting pressured into doing things I never wanted to do. Certain boundaries with your mate shouldnt be crossed and he definately crossed them. Not many people know this but I had an abortion. Not because I wanted to (to be real i didnt believe in abortion until this happened) but because I would feel like the worst woman in the world to allow any child of mine to be raised with a father like that. I lost a good amount of friends because NO ONE wanted to be around him. And being alone with friends wasnt so easy seeing as how he was blowing up my phone if he didnt hear from me every 30 minutes. Shit I couldnt even go see my family without him guilt tripping me for not being with him 24/7. There were times when I seriously felt like he needed to have absolute power over me. No talking about San Antonio or mentioning the name Davis, No drinking without him and if we were drinking together he was constantly setting a limit for me. Kinda funny because little did he know all of his friends would sneak me beer on the side because they thought it was lame. I was constantly being accused of cheating... the best time though was when I was accused because of a dream he had. I mean shit... I cheat on you in a dream... I MUST be doing it in real life too. Also, It seemed like the only time he ever cleaned was just so he could bitch about it. The one thing that REALLY pissed me off was coming home just to find that he had helped himself to my personal weed stash. I know this because his friends would tell me when he would dip his sleezy caloused fingers into my jar. I had the great pleasure of becoming friends with one of his exs, but the second he found out i talked to her he tried to ban me from speaking to her. That didnt work. I used to tell him to invite one of his other Exs over so that I could try and spark a friendship with her too but that failed because he didnt want me talking to her. I think its funny how everytime they would try and hang out with him he would decline and use the excuse that i didnt like them or didnt want them talking. which in turn made his exs hate me. funny because i ALWAYS encouraged him to go hang out with them or invite them over for drinks. ugh its disgusting just thinkin about how much heat i took for EVERYTHING, how many fights between us that people saw, how many times he yelled at sales people in stores and left me along with anyone with us feeling embarassed, how many times I had to call and apologize to people for his behavior. I wish i could apologize to my family for even bringing such a negative soul to meet them. No woman should ever have to deal with such a monster. To be quite honest, I do hope that one day he can find a girl that is tough as nails to put him in his place and make him act right. someone who can also deal with anything he has to throw her way. If she's weak... I think she should run like hell while she has the chance. Now that I'm out of that. I will NEVER EVER let another BOY take advantage of me. After I left I wanted to stay away from all guys... but.... just when I least expected to find the perfect man, I did. and he APPRECIATES everything about me, never gets jealous and never sets limits for anything I do. He wants me to be free. And thankfully.... he DOESNT do the scratch and sniff test. grossss