Lost and Confused....Worried and Scared
What to do? What to do? I have a couple very chalenging decisions to make and I don't know what to do.
First off, I may get a chance to go to Orlando, FL next month for work. But unfortunately this comes at the same time as when I need to be moving Mom into a new assisted living facility. How do I make time for both things? Can I really afford to go either monetarily or time wise? Plus a friend's wedding is the end of that week. Will I be able to get back in time? I'm scared to leave Mom alone for a week or more. She has been so sick at times lately. Plus how can I be sure these awful people will treat her well while I am gone. I want to go to Orlando in a way. I've never been to Florida and this may be the only trip I get to go on for work this year. Other people in my section have been to lots of trips for their jobs, but I don't get to go because I am under different funding. So if I refuse I may not get another chance. Plus they may see me as wishy-washy since I did originally ask to go. It would be nice to get away for a while. I've been so stressed out a mini-vacation would be nice. But will I enjoy getting to go at all? Will I just worry the entire time about money and Mom? Oh what to do!
My other quandry is about Mom. We need to pick a new assisted living place for her to go to. I think we have got just the right spot, but I'm not sure. A couple of their rules make me warry. Like if she asks for trays brought to her room a lot it will be $15/tray. Plus this place is brand new. How will we know if the service is any good? Then there is the money situation. We have to use John Hancock long term care insurance to pay for all of this. But it will only last about 5 years. We have spent 6 months already. The plan has been to save as much as we can to use for when we run out, but we haven't been able to save because of having to move again. I worry Mom will get worse and all the insurance money will be gone. What do we do then? I know 5 years is a long way off, but I have to plan for the future. Should I let her do independent living someplace that has a lot of the same ammenities? But we wouldn't have help from the policy then. But we wouldn't use it up either. At the same time there is a chance she might get worse.
Another part of this I'm actually getting her checked out to see if she has pancreatic cancer. She has all the signs and symptoms I've read and heard about. She matches to a T with symptoms of coworker's family members that were lost to this horrible disease. If we put her in this place I'm thinking of, will they provide enough care if she does have cancer? Will this be the best place for her overall? I just want to make sure she is treated right and can enjoy some of her life.
Oh if those jerks at Mansions hadn't been the way they are and threaten us so. Then we could have kept her there with her new friends and she could have been happy there. They make me so mad.
But I'm so worried and scared and lost and confused. I don't know what to do. I hate having to make all of these hard decisions! Should I take the trip to Orlando? Or back out? Should I go with this place we picked out? Or look more at independent living? Or keep looking? What do I do?????
First off, I may get a chance to go to Orlando, FL next month for work. But unfortunately this comes at the same time as when I need to be moving Mom into a new assisted living facility. How do I make time for both things? Can I really afford to go either monetarily or time wise? Plus a friend's wedding is the end of that week. Will I be able to get back in time? I'm scared to leave Mom alone for a week or more. She has been so sick at times lately. Plus how can I be sure these awful people will treat her well while I am gone. I want to go to Orlando in a way. I've never been to Florida and this may be the only trip I get to go on for work this year. Other people in my section have been to lots of trips for their jobs, but I don't get to go because I am under different funding. So if I refuse I may not get another chance. Plus they may see me as wishy-washy since I did originally ask to go. It would be nice to get away for a while. I've been so stressed out a mini-vacation would be nice. But will I enjoy getting to go at all? Will I just worry the entire time about money and Mom? Oh what to do!
My other quandry is about Mom. We need to pick a new assisted living place for her to go to. I think we have got just the right spot, but I'm not sure. A couple of their rules make me warry. Like if she asks for trays brought to her room a lot it will be $15/tray. Plus this place is brand new. How will we know if the service is any good? Then there is the money situation. We have to use John Hancock long term care insurance to pay for all of this. But it will only last about 5 years. We have spent 6 months already. The plan has been to save as much as we can to use for when we run out, but we haven't been able to save because of having to move again. I worry Mom will get worse and all the insurance money will be gone. What do we do then? I know 5 years is a long way off, but I have to plan for the future. Should I let her do independent living someplace that has a lot of the same ammenities? But we wouldn't have help from the policy then. But we wouldn't use it up either. At the same time there is a chance she might get worse.
Another part of this I'm actually getting her checked out to see if she has pancreatic cancer. She has all the signs and symptoms I've read and heard about. She matches to a T with symptoms of coworker's family members that were lost to this horrible disease. If we put her in this place I'm thinking of, will they provide enough care if she does have cancer? Will this be the best place for her overall? I just want to make sure she is treated right and can enjoy some of her life.
Oh if those jerks at Mansions hadn't been the way they are and threaten us so. Then we could have kept her there with her new friends and she could have been happy there. They make me so mad.
But I'm so worried and scared and lost and confused. I don't know what to do. I hate having to make all of these hard decisions! Should I take the trip to Orlando? Or back out? Should I go with this place we picked out? Or look more at independent living? Or keep looking? What do I do?????