busy body..
im in my dorm room right now. all my roommates are sleeping. there are certain nights where i can get to sleep. then there are nights like this where i just cant. which is pretty lame. i dont want to take a sleepin pill because i have class at 830 in the morning so i think im just going to pull an all-nighter. which is normal for me. i do it all the time. i could never do it when i worked at the airport. i was always so freakin tired at work. one nite i actually fell asleep in a guys arms because i was so tired. though he had me up for over 24 hrs. no we werent doing the nasty. geez. he wanted to hang out. the first guy i really liked since high school and he blow me off the last week i was in madison. why. bullshit. im still not over him probably because he treated me so good. i kind of wish i didnt delete him out of my phone now because i want to talk to him so badly right now. i know i equal lameness. i want to run into when i go home, i wonder if i go to the gas station at that certain time when he always came and visited me if i would see him. damnit. i need to stop thinkin about him i really do.
random but i wish my keyboard on my laptop would light up. but nope. darkness for the keys..
ok back to ranting. drew is driving me crazy, im getting to the point where i have no sarcasum (sp) left for when he says "im so excited to see you again." reminder its been exactly one month since i left wisconsin. stop pushing me away. clingyness scares me. maybe thats why i suck at dating. i always date guys who want to be all clingy and have to see you every fucking day. okok step off breathing space please.
josh has started to talk to me again. i still kind of like him but we'll see what happens when i come back.
i miss my friends.
i think i must be annoying or not fun because none of my friends call me like they call eachother. i make effort but i get non towards my way. what am i doing wrong?
whatever. im being pathetic.
i miss my boys.
ahhhhhhhh
i want to sleep. why cant i fall asleep. is it really because im truly homesick or is it because i truly dont like it in cali?
maybe if i was older it would be different. maybe i took to big of a first step. take a step back. school in chicago is looking so much better everyday!!!!!!! please let me in your school!
random but i wish my keyboard on my laptop would light up. but nope. darkness for the keys..
ok back to ranting. drew is driving me crazy, im getting to the point where i have no sarcasum (sp) left for when he says "im so excited to see you again." reminder its been exactly one month since i left wisconsin. stop pushing me away. clingyness scares me. maybe thats why i suck at dating. i always date guys who want to be all clingy and have to see you every fucking day. okok step off breathing space please.
josh has started to talk to me again. i still kind of like him but we'll see what happens when i come back.
i miss my friends.
i think i must be annoying or not fun because none of my friends call me like they call eachother. i make effort but i get non towards my way. what am i doing wrong?
whatever. im being pathetic.
i miss my boys.
ahhhhhhhh
i want to sleep. why cant i fall asleep. is it really because im truly homesick or is it because i truly dont like it in cali?
maybe if i was older it would be different. maybe i took to big of a first step. take a step back. school in chicago is looking so much better everyday!!!!!!! please let me in your school!