Maybe she believes me. Do I believe me?
I saw my psychiatrist last week. She doesn't think the anti-depressant she prescribed me is making my constipation worse. I've read things online that it can cause constipation but some websites don't comment on it while others do. Oh, well.
I've gained about 7 pounds in the 3 weeks since I saw her first. She had a scale in the office and I wondered if that was for me or if her previous patient (a male) needed to be weighed. At the time I was pretty glad about gaining weight, especially with all the snow-walking I've had to do. Now I feel a little ambivalent, especially since the weight gain seems to come with a bloating stomach. Because I've had chronic constipation for at least two decades, more often than not I have a bloated stomach. The days I do have a flat stomach, I get very vain about it. Very, very vain. It kind of irritates me I need "fat pants" not just when I'm on my period but for most of the month.
We've increased the dosage. I think I'm okay with the emotional distancing I feel. So far I haven't cried once on my period, which is unusual. I can get used to this. I also don't feel like killing myself. When I'm anxious, like having to make an impromptu presentation in a class, I think about cutting, but the deep yearning for it isn't there anymore.
Maybe once my body is used to the increased dosage and I have a better diet with the increased appetite the anti-depressant gives me, my bloating will be better. Some of my pants are uncomfortable and dig in. It's kind of stupid that the weight gain seems to be mostly in my abdomen or legs. I would like for it to spread to my torso/ribs and arms. I get very cold easily.
I've gained about 7 pounds in the 3 weeks since I saw her first. She had a scale in the office and I wondered if that was for me or if her previous patient (a male) needed to be weighed. At the time I was pretty glad about gaining weight, especially with all the snow-walking I've had to do. Now I feel a little ambivalent, especially since the weight gain seems to come with a bloating stomach. Because I've had chronic constipation for at least two decades, more often than not I have a bloated stomach. The days I do have a flat stomach, I get very vain about it. Very, very vain. It kind of irritates me I need "fat pants" not just when I'm on my period but for most of the month.
We've increased the dosage. I think I'm okay with the emotional distancing I feel. So far I haven't cried once on my period, which is unusual. I can get used to this. I also don't feel like killing myself. When I'm anxious, like having to make an impromptu presentation in a class, I think about cutting, but the deep yearning for it isn't there anymore.
Maybe once my body is used to the increased dosage and I have a better diet with the increased appetite the anti-depressant gives me, my bloating will be better. Some of my pants are uncomfortable and dig in. It's kind of stupid that the weight gain seems to be mostly in my abdomen or legs. I would like for it to spread to my torso/ribs and arms. I get very cold easily.