i hate myself.

[unevrletmefall]

so it never fails that i get these like flash back moods
where i suck at life
and i feel like shit
like i did for a year of my life after a person
made my once so well known world come crashing down.
i feel like that again.
this happens often but finally its bad.
purely confused and have no idea what the fuck is going on.
simply put.
i dont give a fuck.
and either should you.
its funny how people still tink they can help me.
you cant. so stop trying.
be there for me but dont try to help you know it doesnt work that way.
im not speaking to anyone specific just speaking.
cause i need to vent
casue no one really listens to me
they are to busy trying to cure the fucking world
and they cant.

<333he makes me so happy
its fake.
but i love it
it reminds me of a long time ago
ive always had a soft spot for this ort of thing.
its derekes fault.
haha boys and the way they make me.
i let them.
but then i dont.

i realized maybe he didnt really love me tonight
i think that was a shock.
"we could have a relationship we have always been wanting" wtf do you know
you dont even know what the fuck you want with your life
and u alreaydf fucke dit up anyways.
okay im done
fuck u
and her
and him.